CSWA ANNIVERSARY 1996: Hot Southern Days and Rock and Roll Nights 3/31/96 (The CSWA Logo appears on the screen...catches on fire, and explodes into tiny pieces) (Fadein: To a sold-out Merritt Auditorium) (Cutto: Bill Buckley and the Red Midget) BILL BUCKLEY: Hello wrestling fans!!! I'm Bill Buckley, and welcome to ANNIVERSARY '96: Hot Southern Days and Rock and Roll Nights! We're coming to you tonight, from the MERRITT AUDITORIUM!! The birthplace of the CSWA! I want to start the night on a good note! For those of you who watched WINTER's WARRIORS VII: The Unforgetable Fire, you know what went down! Well, a lot of things went down! But, if you watched you know, that President Schmiddy got POOPED AND FIRED! He's out of here... the funny thing is he's trying to build the AAWC up from scratch! Good luck... the biggest news, however..is Sammy Benson has been FIRED as well! After 8 years, my prays have finally been answered...Benson is history!! Life is great is it not? Replacing Sammy, is none other that my NEW co-host THE RED MIDGET!!!!(crowd roars) RED MIDGET: YEAAAHHHH!!! You gotta love it! Buckley, it's great to be here! BILL BUCKLEY: Great to have you aboard! RED, what's on your mind? RED MIDGET: Buckley, I might be a midget..but even I can fill Sammy's shoes! I hear he's even planning to show up tonight on AAWC NITRO!! BILL BUCKLEY: AAWC NITRO?! Geez, it's not like we haven't seen that before... RED MIDGET: Yeah, I hear next week they're bringing in Steve McMichaels! *laugh* BILL BUCKLEY: Speaking of NITRO, folks don't waste your time switching over there, not that you would anyway! The Midget Manics were mugged before the card...and couldn't wrestle..not bad considering that President Poop had been quoted as saying "Midgets Will NOT wrestle in the AAWC!" RED MIDGET: I wonder who ordered that attack! Fans you want real action, you want a place where even Midgets can roam, then stick with the #1 stick with the CSWA! BILL BUCKLEY: RED, what about that big NITRO main event? Randalls and GUNS to a time limit draw?! How predictable! But, you have to admit the 20 man brawl at the end was cute! RED MIDGET: If you say so...personally I could never follow a league, where the president has had a ton of poop dropped on his head! BILL BUCKLEY: *laugh* How about that Chartmaster skit? I guess Vince is backing him, huh...Charts, Web, Thomas eating poop, and our Senior VP a drunk... The Charts and the web, say we're at the top...when you're jealous you're jealous.... but let's clear something, Schmiddy was the only one to 'watch' Thomas eat poop...but then again, why should we take a cross dressers word for it? RED MIDGET: *laugh* Good point. The man was fired and pooped and this is his sorry attempt at a comeback... You almost feel sorry for the guy.. BILL BUCKLEY: Indeed... when we come back... ANNIVERSARY kicks off!! BILL BUCKLEY: What a great crowd, RED! ANNIVERSARY has always been special...but this year, it may be the best ever! RED MIDGET: Don't you usually say that every year? BILL BUCKLEY: Well, yeah.. but this year I mean it! RED MIDGET: Oh! Would it be too much to ask, if I got a beer around here... BILL BUCKLEY: Not you too... RED MIDGET: Hey, I'm not like Benson.. I can stop anytime I want to! BILL BUCKLEY: This is going to be a long night... Rhubarb it's all yours! ============================================================ Carl Brigsby vs Tidle Wave BILL BUCKLEY: Tidle Wave, one of the many new faces that CS has brought in of late, is set to square off against a former UNITED STATES TAG TEAM Champion! RED MIDGET: Brigsby/Paige may have held the US tag belts, but I'd like to see them fight the Midget Maniacs! BILL BUCKLEY: I miss Sammy already.... There's the bell, and it's Brigsby with a standing dropkick! Another one! He's doing everything he can to get this huge man off his feet! RED MIDGET: Kick him in the groin! BILL BUCKLEY: Stop! Brigsby, OHMYGAWD he just body slammed the man!! DID YOU SEE THAT!!! RED MIDGET: Of course I saw it, I'm sitting not 10 feet from the ring!! BILL BUCKLEY: Carl races to the top rope, he might pull off the upset of the night! Tidle Wave isn't moving, the force of his own weight might have knocked himself out! RED MIDGET: LOOK THERE'S DINK!! BILL BUCKLEY: Brigsby, is all set...he flys off the top...OHMY he missed the Jump splash by 15 feet! How could he miss a target like that? RED MIDGET: (Greeting a waitress)(Pouring a beer into a wine glass) Thank you my good dear.. BILL BUCKLEY: Tidle Wave, off the ropes...AH!! He dropped it all right on Brigsby's chest! ONE.....TWO.....THREE!! WOW! For a second there, it looked as if Carl might pull one out! RED MIDGET: I hate to be a pest...but I might need a booster seat! BILL BUCKLEY: (in tears) I gotta get out of this line of work.... I wonder how many days of paid vacation I still have?! RED MIDGET: What a great win, for Tidle Wave... by the look of the man... it seems he ate the losers of the 20=man Midget Battle Royal, a few weeks back. BILL BUCKLEY: Good win for the newcomer, Tidle Wave! He's really starting off strong...some times you see the young guys get lost in a big federation like the CSWA, but this kid has really stepped it up! RED MIDGET: I don't care... if he's eating Midgets, he should be shot! BILL BUCKLEY: Would you get off of that!! RED MIDGET: I'm sorry..it's just...I fear for my kind... there aren't...but 100 of us left! BILL BUCKLEY: I hate my life.. RED MIDGET: Now..now... here have a drink! ============================================================ HEARTBREAKER VS WESLEY PAIGE BILL BUCKLEY: Wesley Paige, Brigsby's tag partner, will have his hands full tonight! He's facing, one of the best rising stars in the business HEARTBREAKER! RED MIDGET: I'm just a sexy boy!!! I'm not your boyy...toyyy! BILL BUCKLEY: Please..stop. There's the bell, HEARTBREAKER will a hip toss! Now..a Belly to Belly!! He's started off with a bang!! RED MIDGET: Where's that freakin' booster chair?! BILL BUCKLEY: HEARTBREAKER whips Paige into the ropes, he catches him with a flying elbow!! The cover, ONE....TWO...NO!! RED MIDGET: Is that Juarez?! BILL BUCKLEY! NOT FUNNY! RED MIDGET: I thought so... BILL BUCKLEY: HEARTBREAKER, to the cheers of the crowd drops a fist on Wesley's head! Paige is stunned, RED it looks like HEARTBREAKER is setting up for his finisher! RED MIDGET: My Jove I think you're right! BILL BUCKLEY: Paige to his feet, A SUPERKICK BY THE HEARTBREAKER!! WHAT A MOVE....ONE.....TWO.....THREE!! Put it in the win column for the HB! Impressive!! RED MIDGET: Impressive, and sexy...what else is there to life! BILL BUCKLEY: You scare me.. ============================================================ FIRE and ICE vs. THE DIRTY DUO ============================================================ BB: It's time for some tag-team action here, as Fire and Ice, newcomers to the CSWA Tag Scene, square off against the Dirty Duo, two grizzled veterans! We've got Vern Peevler starting this one off against Ice, ICE WITH AN ARMDRAG, takes him down to the canvas! ICE with a BIG DROPKICK! Ice sends Peeveler off the ropes, and CONNECTS WITH A POWERSLAM, ONE, TWO, kickout by Peevler! RM: Bill, another telephone book, please? I can't see the match.... BB: Red, that's your fifth already! (Sighs) Well, at least you're not Benson. Ice with a series of big right hands, sends Peevler into the corner, CHARGES IN, and PEEVLER PUTS UP THE BOOT! ICE staggering, and Peevler takes him down to the canvas with an IMPRESSIVE LARIET! Peevler not going for the cover, instead he's making the tag to his partner, Bob Stanley! RM: These guys SOUND old....forget about looking the part! BB: Stanley with a knee to the midsection of Ice, he picks up Ice, and SLAMS him down to the canvas! A cover here by Stanley, ONE, TWO, not even close....you're gonna have to do more than that to get a victory here in the CSWA! Stanley sends Ice off the ropes, BACK-BODYDROP..... RM: He telegraphed that one! BB: And Ice counters with a DDT! Stanley is down on the canvas, and fans, he's out of it! Ice to the corner, and he makes the tag to Fire! Peevler trying to get into the ring, and Fire CHARGES INTO THE RING WITH A SPIN KICK, hauling Peevler back over the top rope and down to the floor! The Dirty Duo is in BIG trouble here! RM: Like that's something new.... BB: You've been drinking again, haven't you? RM: Just a little.... BB: Well, for you, a little is alot! If you don't be careful, we're gonna have to put you in a 12-step program....then again...your steps are smaller than everyone else's! RM: Them's fighting words..... BB: (Laughs) Pipe down, little man. Fire sends Stanley off the ropes, TILT-A-WHIRL BACKBREAKER! Ice going up top, and Fire makes the tag....here comes a ROCKET LAUNCHER....down unto Stanley...IT CONNECTS! This one's over! A cover, ONE, TWO, THREE!!! FIRE and ICE with the IMPRESSIVE victory! RM: I've got to hand it to them....they looked good tonight....but let them get into the ring with some REAL competition! BB: Well, I'm sure that'll come in due time....fans, we've got to take a short break for the sponsors....and when we return, we'll have a VERY SPECIAL SEGMENT for you....you don't want to miss this one for anything! BILL BUCKLEY: Before we continue with the action, I understand there's a problem in the parking lots! Do we... Ok..I understand we have a camera in the back!! =========================================================== (in the parking lot, near the entrance to the locker rooms, a short, funny looking man is sitting on a chair..next to a table full of T-shirts, and other Merchandise) President Schmid: T-SHIRTS!! GET YOUR TOM ALDER T-SHIRTS!! COME ONE COME ALL....ONLY....1000 OF THESE BABIES ARE LEFT! (a small crowd walks by) President Schmid: Hey folks! Wanna a T-shirt? Or maybe a WRESTLEFEST PROGRAM! MAN: No, that's ok....we're already late as it is..don't want to miss anymore of that GREAT CSWA action! President Schmid: Ok..Ok...i know what you want..you want impressions, right? *laugh* Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the last 6 months of the AAWC!! Obiviously I can't fit it all, but I'm just going to hit the highlights... once again, the final 6 months of the AAWC..here i go.... "ADLER! ADLER! ADLER! ADLER! ADLER! ADLER! ONCE AGAIN THE CROWD CHANTS ADLER! ADLER! ADLER! ADLER!" Well, what'cha think? Kid to dad: Daddy, are suppose to pay the bum now? President Schmid: I'm not a bum!! I'm the AAWC President darn it! Ah...go fly a kite! (crowd leaves...Schmiddy sits..picking poop that he obiviously didn't get out, out of his hair) (Mark Windham walks by) President Schmid: Mr.Windham!!! Just the man I was looking for!! You want to see an impression!! Mark Windham: Not really, Poopy. I have to get ready for my workout tonight!! President Schmid: Fair enough...have you thought about my offer to join the AAWC yet? Mark Windham: Yes I have... President Schmid: What's your answer!!!! Mark Windham: You're not begging, are you! President Schmid: Begging? Gosh no... Mark Windham: No, I mean...you're not begging.... President Schmid: oh....PLEASE..MARK..PLEASE..COME TO THE AAWC...I'LL MAKE IT WORTH YOUR WHILE...PLEASE... I KNOW I CAN'T EVEN MATCH YOUR MONTHLY SALARY FROM CS...BUT I BEG YOU COME BACK HOME!!! Mark Windham: Gawd...have you no shame? Begging, are you a man, or..... President Schmid: Does this mean, you're not coming?! Mark Windham: *laughing out loud* You figure it out.. and for gawd's sake..wash your hair, kid.. there's poop still in there! Will I come to the AAWC? It's nice to have dreams, Schimddy... (fadeout: As Schmiddy continues to push Adler Merchandise) BB: We're back, and how about that! Robert Schmid hawking Tom Adler T-Shirts out in the parking lot....there's only one thing wrong with that picture, Red, and that's the fact that Adler isn't IN the AAWC....he knows where the BIG BOYS PLAY! RM: And the midgets, too! I saw what happened to my midget friends....but we don't go down easily....we'll be back! BB: Now, it's time to head down to ringside....and this one, well, you ain't gonna want to miss it.... ============================================================ TUXEDO MATCH POISON IVY vs. TERI MELTON ============================================================ BB: The rules of this one are simple....whoever can rip the tuxedo off their opponent is the winner! RM: Actually...the winners of this one are the fans! I'm looking forward to this....because I can get a good look at hooters....and I'm so short they can't see me! BB: (Sighs) There's the bell, and this one's ready to go. Patrick Young gets the honor of reffing this one....and I'd bet there was quite a fight backstage between our refs to take this match! We're ready to go....and look at THAT! Teri Melton SLAPS Poison Ivy in the face....Ivy falls down to the canvas, and she isn't happy! RM: Well, maybe I should go in there and make her feel better! BB: Maybe you should sit down. Poison Ivy is FURIOUS....blocks a right hand, and NAILS Teri Melton with a knee to the gut! Teri doubles over, and Ivy's clawing at the eyes....she's gonna try and poke Teri Melton's eyes out! RM: She doesn't need them anyways....we all know what she's about.... BB: Poison Ivy going for the tuxedo....and she's got the right arm off! Ivy grabs Teri by the hair, and FLINGS her over the top, down to the floor....Teri Melton might be hurt! RM: Hardly. She landed right on her hooters....that's like having air-bags! BB: Whoa boy. Poison Ivy off the apron, and she NAILS Teri with clubbing forearms....and she's going for the Tuxedo pants....I think she's gonna get them off! NO! Teri with a high heel kick, and she sends Ivy down to the concrete! Now, Teri to her feet, and LOOK OUT! Big karate kick and Ivy carries into the post! She might be out cold! RM: You know....she learned that karate kick from me! BB: I'm sure. Teri going for Ivy's leg....and she RIPS off th right leg of the Tux....both Ivy and Teri are missing a limb! Teri setting up Poison Ivy...SUPLEX ON THE FLOOR? YES! Teri using her wrestling ability to her fullest advantage! RM: Who wants to see wrestling? BB: Have another drink, Red. Teri rolls Ivy into the ring, and Poison Ivy, it doesn't appear that she's moving...Teri going up top....we're gonna see the TERISAULT...here it comes....NO! IVY ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY! Poison Ivy trying to use the ropes to get back to her feet....and if she can, this one might be over already! RM: Get a look at that! I guess she left her bra at home! BB: It seems that Poison Ivy's tux has an unsightly tear.... this is family entertainment! RM: I knew those stories about you and the gay bars were true! BB: That's ENOUGH. Another crack, and you'll be working with Emmanuel Lewis! RM: I'll be good. BB: Poison Ivy back to her feet....and she's pulling the pants off of Teri....SHE'S GOT THEM OFF! Poison Ivy's winning this match....as she's only lost a leg....Teri's lost an arm....and her pants! Look at the crowd, they're going crazy! RM: I think a couple of them want to help out! BB: I'm sure they do....but one of them WON'T be you. Maybe I should take away those telephone books! BB: We're back, and Poison Ivy SLAMS Teri into the buckle, again....and AGAIN! Now, Teri's down on the canvas, and Poison Ivy is choking her out! Patrick Young not getting involved....either he's scared to death....or he's really getting a kick out of this! RM: I think it's both! BB: Could be. Ivy pulls Teri to her feet, and SHOVES her into the corner! Ivy CHARGES IN WITH A CLOTHESLINE....AND TERI PUTS UP THE HIGH HEELS! Ivy got NAILED in the face, she's down, and she might be out cold! Teri trying to collect herself....and she's down on top of Ivy, trying to rip off the tuxedo top! RM: I think I've seen this movie already..... BB: (Sighs) Teri's got Ivy's top off! She's pointing at Ivy's....um.... RM: Spit it out....HOOTERS! BB: Thanks....and at hers....and she's laughing again! Ivy has one leg of the tuxedo left....she's in big trouble! But, what in the world is Teri doing? She's still laughing at Ivy's chest..... RM: Well, it's nothing to laugh at....unless you're Teri! BB: Finally, Teri is dragging Poison Ivy into the center of the ring, and I really don't know why she isn't going to pull off the rest of Ivy's pants....instead, she's going up top AGAIN! I guess she wants to get the TERISAULT in! RM: But, Poison Ivy's getting back to her feet! BB: You're right! Teri still climbing to the top rope, and Ivy SLAMS HER OFF! Ivy grabed Teri's top....AND IT'S OFF! Teri's tuxedo has been ripped off....that means POISON IVY HAS WON THE MATCH! RM: Whoa boy! I'm getting a closer look at this! BB: No, you're not. You can't see over the ring apron anyways....I know you're faking it. Ivy with her hand raised in victory, and Teri is none too happy about being stripped down to her underwear here on national TV....she's back to her feet, and she NAILS Ivy from behind with a chair! Ivy's down, and she's out cold! Melton has the chair, and she's SLAMMING it against Ivy's head, again and again! Officials running down to ringside, trying to break this up..... RM: Nah, I think they're trying to cop a feel! BB: Finally, CSWA officials have managed to separate Teri Melton from Poison Ivy, and even though Ivy was victorious here tonight....she certainly PAID for that victory! Now, what in the world is Teri doing....she's got the mic! ============================================================ TERI MELTON: Steven, baby, you don't know how much I miss you.....you're more of a MAN than Scotty will EVER be! He couldn't even get it up most of the time....I'm sorry for walking out on you after that match you lost to my brother.....what do you say, Steven....we were MAGIC together....let's do it again! ============================================================ BB: I don't believe what I've just heard! I thought this was FAMILY broadcasting! And now, obviously, here comes Flair down to the ring....and look at that grin on his face....I don't think I've EVER seen him happier! ============================================================ STEVEN FLAIR: 'Ya know something, Teri....YOU'RE RIGHT! You and I....together again! It don't get any better than this! ============================================================ BB: Oh boy....I think I've now seen everything! Steven Flair carrying Teri back to the lockers....I guess she just dumped Scotty Michaels! What a golddigger! Fans, we've got to take a break, but we'll be right back with more CSWA action! Red, PUT DOWN THAT FLASK! BILL BUCKLEY: It's safe to say, I've never seen anything like what just happened! IVY and Teri!! Whoa boy! RED MIDGET: NUDITY! NUDITY! NUDITY! BILL BUCKLEY: Cool down, little man! RED MIDGET: Little man? Little man? BILL BUCKLEY: I didn't mean it that way! Geez RED MIDGET: I'm hurt... BILL BUCKLEY: You need help... ============================================================ Aaron Reno vs Wild Asian BILL BUCKLEY: RED, this should be a good one. The former Greensboro Heavyweight Champion Wild Asian, is looking to climb back up the rankings! But, he's got a very touch opponent in the rising star Aaron Reno! RED MIDGET: Mark my words, BIG MAN, Reno will have gold very very soon! BILL BUCKLEY: That's very possible. Asian, and his lovely manager...POISON IVY are set to go! RED MIDGET: Lovely, and might I point out, dangerous! However, I could beat the snot out of her..unlike Benson! BILL BUCKLEY: Reno starts this one off, by stealing IVY's cane! He's caning the Wild Asian in the middle of the ring! OHMY he took a swing at IVY but she managed to get out of the ring! RED MIDGET: First off you don't hit a lady! You spank her! BILL BUCKLEY: STOP! Reno throws the cane over near his corner...Aaron with a slingshot suplex! He's looking to make a mark in the CSWA, by beating the former G'boro champ! RED MIDGET: He just made a mark with that cane! BILL BUCKLEY: Reno with an inside cradle! ONE....TWO...NO! Almost the biggest one of this kid's life! Aaron with a thumb to the eyes! RED MIDGET: Little man? BILL BUCKLEY: Reno whips Asian into the ropes, attempts a clothesline, but WA ducks...bounces off the ropes and sticks Reno with a flying elbow! (Reno/Wild Asian cont..) BILL BUCKLEY: Wild Asian, stopped Reno dead in his tracks with that blow! WA shoots off the ropes, and flips over onto Reno! What a move! RED MIDGET: That's what I like to call the midget rollover! BILL BUCKLEY: I'm not going to ask...Asian with the cover, ONE...TWO..NO! It's going to take more than that! Asian grabs Aaron by the hair, swinging neckbreaker! RED MIDGET: What time does the Midget battle royal start? BILL BUCKLEY: Stop! WA leaps on the second rope, and splashes down on Reno!!Aaron rolls outside, and WA follows him! LOOK OUT, Ivy with the cane! OHMY she's deadly RED! RED MIDGET: I'd just like to see her try that on me! BILL BUCKLEY: Wild Asian, is setting up a table! Ivy and Asian place Reno ontop of the table....this could get ugly! RED MIDGET: Why is Schmiddy in sight? BILL BUCKLEY: (laughing) Good one... RED MIDGET: I try... BILL BUCKLEY: Reno is laying helpless on the table..Wild Asian climbs all the way to the top ropes! WA, reverse moonsault off the top rope onto the table!! OHMYGAWD Reno moved, and the Wild Asian broke through the table neck first! RED MIDGET: He's in trouble Bill! BILL BUCKLEY: I don't know what to say, WA hit neck first! RED his neck might be broken!! RED MIDGET: He's not moving, Bill! We need to get some help out there, on the double! BILL BUCKLEY: Reno isn't continuing with the match! Aaron calls the ref over...this is serious! Wild Asian is known for his high risk, suicidal moves, but this time it's backfired! Patrick Young is calling for the bell, this match will be awarded to Aaron Reno! RED MIDGET: Bill, Reno is shaking his head! He's not going to take a victory this way...he may be arrogant, but give Reno credit, he's refusing to take the win like this. BILL BUCKLEY: Poison Ivy is in tears..her wrestler is seriously injuried. Here comes medicial attention! Folks, Wild Asian is being placed on a stretcher! RED MIDGET: You hate to see that..this terrible! BILL BUCKLEY: The fans cheer, as Asian is charted out of the arena. IVY, as I said, is in tears...Look at this! HORNET greets them halfway down the aisle! IVY grabs HORNET, she's crying her eyes out! RED, this might be the end of the Wild Asian's career! RED MIDGET: I hope not..let's all pray this kid will be ok! BILL BUCKLEY: Despite what just happened to the Wild Asian, the action will continue! RED MIDGET: Fans, we'll try to bring you an update on the Asian's condition, before we leave the air tonight! BILL BUCKLEY: Right now, we're scheduled to have the IC Title defense! RED MIDGET: Somehow, Bill, I doubt that POISON IVY will be at ringside with Eliminator! ============================================================ MTV vs ELIMINATOR Intracontential Title Defense BILL BUCKLEY: RED, MTV is one of the many new faces brought in by CS Enterprises! He's managed by Matt Rosenthal..and that means he's a part of the Rosenthal family! RED MIDGET: Rosenthal is still looking for his first taste of gold...Co-commissioner Chad Merritt took away the IC belt that ATTAXX won from ELI! BILL BUCKLEY: Well, we all know the story about that! CS have started to crackdown on some of the cheating going on in the CSWA! RED MIDGET: It's their league, so they can do whatever they want, I suppose! BILL BUCKLEY: As you suspected RED, POISON IVY is nowhere to be seen, it's safe to say she's on her way to the hospital with the Wild Asian! RED MIDGET: I don't care, she should be here with the big man! BILL BUCKLEY: Would you stop, with all the big man..little man crap! There's the bell, and MTV is all over Eli! MTV whips Eli into the ropes, powerslam!! Man alive! RED MIDGET: Look at ELI, Bill! He looks lost..without IVY, and what happened to WA has to be bothering him! BILL BUCKLEY: MTV lifts Eli to his feet, a knee to the mid-section, and now one to the forehead that sits the Eliminator on his butt! RED MIDGET: Eli is not himself on there, tonight! I told you IVY should be out here! BILL BUCKLEY: MTV with a vicious clothesline! OHMY! We could have a new champion, right here! ONE.....TWO...NO! So close! RED MIDGET: We're going to have a new champion, tonight I can feel it! BILL BUCKLEY: MTV stays on the attack at Rosenthal's command, a bulldog! RED, I can't believe what we're seeing! (MTV/Eliminator cont...) BILL BUCKLEY: RED, I kind of have to believe you, when you say there's going to be a new champion tonight! RED MIDGET: Eli is not Eli, he can't win! BILL BUCKLEY: A butterfly suplex, by MTV! That was nice! Now, the challenger is heading to the top! MTV with a dropkick from the top! RED MIDGET: Big time move, by the big man! BILL BUCKLEY: Would you stop! Eli staggers to his feet, as he's met with a superkick! Right now, MTV is doing whatever he pleases with the IC Champion! RED MIDGET: I don't expect Eli to last much longer than two or three more minutes! BILL BUCKLEY: MTV can smell the title, he wants it so badly! MTV lifts Eli above his head....bench press slam! What a show of power! RED MIDGET: If Eliminator wants to keep his belt, he's got to mount some sort of offense right now! BILL BUCKLEY: MTV, with a gorebuster! You don't see that move to often! Rosenthal, screams at his man, he wants this over now! MTV, has Eli up...Brainbuster! RED MIDGET: MTV to the top! He's going to fly off with his patten elbow drop! BILL BUCKLEY: MTV off the top, but Eliminator gets his leg up! The kid's face hit hard against Eli's boot! RED MIDGET: I could have sworn that was it! BILL BUCKLEY: Rosenthal is livid...he thought he had the title! Eli is to his feet! Listen to this crowd! They love him! Eliminator with an inverted atomic drop! RED MIDGET: Ouch! BILL BUCKLEY: Reno is stunned, Eli with a clothesline! This is starting to look more and more like the old Eliminator! The IC champion finds his way to the top rope! From the corner, he flies off with a TR Clothesline!! RED MIDGET: That's a BIG time move! BILL BUCKLEY: He's going to do it, ONE....TWO....THREE!!! Somehow, someway Eli pulls this one out!! OHMY! RED MIDGET: Rosenthal is going nuts, he can't believe it! BILL BUCKLEY: Even without IVY, Eli manages to get the win, and retain his IC championship! BB: Fans, we're back, and it's time for the GREENSBORO CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH! As you know, "Blazin'" BILLY STARR took home the title at WINTER WARRIOR'S VII, defeating the WILD ASIAN....tonight he's got to step into the ring and make his FIRST DEFENSE, against a tough customer, STEVEN GAGE....who has Lady Luck in his corner! RM: I'd bet you thought that was witty..... BB: Maybe, but, I'm not the one wearing a Mighty Morphin Suit, am I? RM: Well...um.....I think.....maybe I can explain that.... BB: That's what I thought. Let's take it down to ringside! ============================================================ GREENSBORO CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH "'Blazin" BILLY STARR vs. STEVEN GAGE ============================================================ BB: We're ready to go here....Starr and Gage lock up, and Gage with an ARMDRAG down to the canvas! Gage looking to take the advantage early on, sends Starr of the ropes, CLOTHESLINE, ducked by Starr, Starr back off the ropes, FLYING BODYPRESS....YES! ONE, TWO, ALMOST A THREE COUNT RIGHT THERE! Starr locks in a side-headlock, and Gage COUNTERS with a BACK-SUPLEX DOWN TO THE CANVAS! What a quick start to this match! RM: I'm....not feeling....too good. BB: Oh gawd. As if Ventolo wasn't bad enough. Gage keeps control of the match, and he scoops up Billy Starr, SLAMS him down to the mat! Gage off the ropes, and he DROPS A LEG! Cover by Gage, ONE, TWO, KICKOUT...you're gonna have to do more than that to pin Billy Starr! Gage trying to lock in a reverse chinlock, and Patrick Young checking it out, making sure it's not a choke..... RM: Whoa....that was close....maybe I should slow it down a little bit.... BB: Starr fighting to his feet, and he BREAKS the chinlock with an elbow to the gut! Starr with a BIG RIGHT HAND, and he picks up Gage, INVERTED ATOMIC DROP! Starr off the ropes, BIG LARIET, NO! SMART MOVE BY GAGE! RM: He ducked down to the canvas, and Starr went flying over the top rope! BB: Starr down on the canvas, and he might be hurt....Gage collecting himself inside of the ring, and this might be the thing he needs to turn things around. Gage grabs the ropes....PLANCHA DOWN ONTO STARR! Gage taking control with a series of chops out on the floor, and he WHIPS STARR INTO THE STAIRS! Starr is in danger of losing the Greensboro Championship right here! RM: And, I'm in danger of running out of beer if these matches last any longer! BB: Gage rolls Starr into the ring, grabs the ropes, SLINGSHOT SPLASH, IT CONNECTS! A cover, ONE, TWO, NEW CHAMPION....NO! Starr gets the foot on the ropes! Gage has his hand raised in victory, but Patrick Young pulls it down. Gage gets back to work, and he's got Billy Starr back against the rope, nailing him with a series of right hands! Gage sends Starr off the ropes, POWERSLAM, NO! Starr gets over the shoulder, and rolls up Gage from behind, ONE, TWO, THREE...NO! Gage JUST OUT! RM: I'm suprised we haven't seen that much out of Starr yet! BB: Starr to his feet first....NO! Gage connects with a savate kick and sends him back down to the canvas! Again, Billy Starr is in a whole lot of trouble....Gage sets him up....GUTWRENCH SUPLEX....INTO A POWERBOMB....IMPRESSIVE! That might be it, right there! RM: Gage is taking too much time....he should go for the cover! BB: Gage turns to Lady Luck, and finally covers Starr, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Starr gets the shoulder up in the nick of time! Gage keeps on Starr, sets him up, and connects with a SWINGING NECKBREAKER! Gage is climbing up to the top, and Starr isn't moving yet....we might see a NEW GREENSBORO Champion crowned right here! Gage from the top.....JUMP SPLASH....NO! STARR PUTS UP THE KNEES! We'll be right back! BB: Gage holding his ribs, he's obviously hurt here. Starr grabs the ropes, and pulls himself back to his feet! Gage back up, CHARGES WITH A CLOTHESLINE, NO! Starr ducks, Gage back off the ropes, FLYING BODYPRESS....and Starr makes the catch! Starr DOWN with a BACKBREAKER! Starr pulls Gage back to his feet, sends him into the corner, and CHARGES IN HARD WITH AN ELBOW! Gage goes crashing down to the canvas! RM: And now, Starr's going up top! BB: That's right, Red! Billy Starr waiting for Gage to get back to his feet....FLYING SHOULDERBLOCK....AND HE CONNECTS! That might be it for the challenger! Starr with a cover, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Gage JUST out! Close call there, and the crowd here in Greensboro can't believe it! Starr argues with Young, but he'll have none of it! Finally, Starr with a boot to the back of Steven Gage, and he's rolling Gage into the center of the ring! RM: He's going for the SCORPION DEATHLOCK! BB: Well, if Starr can lock it in, we might see the end of this match right here! Starr trying to get Gage over, can he....he's fighting....AND HE GETS GAGE OVER! Young down on the match, I think he expects Steven Gage to give it up..... but he's NOT! He's holding on....for how much longer, I don't know! RM: There's no way he can stay in this hold for long without permanent damage! Ask GUNS! BB: I'm sure that brings up bad memories to GUNS, a man we'll see in action later tonight....I've got to wonder where his head's at right now. Gage still in the Scorpion, and somehow, someway, he's holding on....wait a second, Lady Luck reaching out...AND SHE PUTS GAGE'S ARM ON THE ROPES! Young breaks the hold, I can't believe it! RM: Well, if the rest of my midget friends were around, we'd be able to avenge that wrong-doing! BB: Thankfully, they're not. Starr can't believe what just happened, and he's yelling at Lady Luck...he should really be paying attention to Gage, because Gage is back to his feet....ROLLS HIM UP, ONE, TWO, NO! Starr up, and he GOES FOR A HUGE CLOTHESLINE....NO! Gage ducks under, and hooks in a CRUCIFIX CRADLE, ONE, TWO, ALMOST A NEW CHAMPION! Starr charges up again, and Gage DUCKS AGAIN! Gage with a stiff right hand, and a left, and he's turning things around! RM: Well, maybe if Starr didn't keep charging Gage, he wouldn't be getting pummeled! BB: Gage sends Starr in for the ride, BIG POWERSLAM! ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Starr just kicks out again! What a match we're seeing here! Gage looking to finish this one off...... he's setting up Starr for a PILEDRIVER....YES! That's gotta be it! Gage not going for a cover, though....he's putting Starr up top....following him up, and there's a SLAP to the face! RM: We're gonna see a SUPERPLEX....well, at least you will. I really need another phone book. BB: We're all out, Red. Gage going for the SUPERPLEX, NO! Starr isn't going! Gage with another attempt, NO! Starr with a RIGHT HAND, Gage tumbling....AND HE'S OFF THE TOP! Gage getting back to his feet....he turns around, STARR OFF THE TOP WITH A SHOOTING STAR PRESS.....IT CONNECTS, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! GAGE ROLLS THROUGH, ONE, TWO, ALMOST A THREE COUNT! WHAT A FLURRY! Gage to his feet first, nails Starr with a right hand! Starr staggers back against the ropes, and Gage sends him in for the ride....HE TELEGRAPHS A BACK-BODYDROP! RM: WHOA MY! BB: Starr just FLIPPED over Gage! Gage back to his feet, and STARR LOCKS IN THE DRAGON SUPLEX FROM BEHIND....HERE IT COMES, YES! ONE, TWO, THREE!!! IT'S OVER, and Billy Starr gets ANOTHER IMPRESSIVE WIN! What a move, as the Greensboro Champion RETAINS....but, let's not forget the effort put out by Steven Gage tonight...this was a great match! Fans, we'll be right back with more! BB: In our next match, we're going to have a REMATCH from WW VII, as "Superstar" STEVEN FLAIR and STEEL VIPER square off! But, Steel Viper's snuck a provision in the contract... should anyone be pinned or sumbit, they'll have to LEAVE the CSWA for 3 MONTHS! How about that one! RM: Well, if I'm Flair, I can't be all too happy about that one....he was lucky the last time! BB: Flair was lucky earlier tonight, as he and Teri Melton have apparently been reunited! And here they come now..... Teri and Steven Flair arm and arm again...who would have thunk it! RM: Well, I wish I had Teri right about now....like I said last week....just because I'M SMALL.... BB: We've heard enough of that, Red. Wait a second....is that the cotton candy man? He's over the railing....and he just NAILED FLAIR FROM BEHIND! The man's got a chair....AND HE WAFFLES FLAIR down to the floor! Wait....that's the TERMINATOR...and he's taking off the mask.....that's the "TERMINATOR" TODD MITCHELL! How about it! Flair's down on the concrete, he never even saw that one coming! Mitchell with a DDT on the chair....OH NO! RM: (Laughs) I remember when we did that to Mad Mike...what a great day that was for Midgets! BB: And mental midgets too! Now, here comes Scotty Michaels....what's going on here? Michaels telling Mitchell to carry Flair out to the ring, and he's kissing Teri? What's going on here? Wait...I think Melton and Michaels have SET UP FLAIR! I don't believe it! RM: You're really swift, aren't you? BB: Mitchell holding Flair for some slaps by Michaels, and now look at that....TERI ALMOST TOOK HIS HEAD OFF! Michaels holding the hair of Flair....and he's in his face, he's got the mic.... ============================================================ SCOTTY MICHAELS: Flair...I put out the challenge....more than ONCE, and EVERY TIME...you've ignored me. Could it be that you haven't noticed me...or jthat you just don't care? Well, take notice NOW, Flair...to the REAL SUPERSTAR! I've got YOUR WOMAN, I've got YOUR NICKNAME, and I've got the ABILITY that you've always wished you would find. FLAIR, you were warned before...but you IGNORED ME! NOW, I'm forced to make YOU look like a FOOL! If you still don't agree to step into that ring with me, well, then the embarassments are going to keep coming. You MORON...you actually think Teri would go back to YOU? (Shakes his head) You know something....you're even DUMBER than President Schmid! I'm the ONLY SUPERSTAR around here, Flair....and you better learn to love it! ============================================================ BB: Finally, Teri and Michaels are leaving Flair, who is CHOKESLAMED down to the canvas by Mitchell! I don't believe what we've seen transpire here....I don't think we've ever seen Steven Flair humilated quite like this before....and HERE COMES STEEL VIPER! Things are just gonna get worse for Steven Flair! ============================================================ LOSER LEAVES FOR 3 MONTHS STEEL VIPER vs. "Superstar" STEVEN FLAIR ============================================================ BB: Flair laid out in the ring, and well, this doesn't bode too well for him. Steel Viper in, and he's laughing. Viper pulls the lifeless Flair to his feet, sends him into the corner, and CHARGES IN WITH AN AVALANCHE! Viper goes for a cover, ONE, TWO, Viper pulls him up! Why, I have no idea.... he could have put Flair out of the CSWA right there! RM: Maybe he wants to hurt the man a little....that ever occur to you? BB: For such a little man, you've got an awful big mouth. Steel Viper sends Flair off the ropes, and CONNECTS WITH A POWERSLAM! Flair is down and out....this match is as good as over before it even started! Steel Viper going up top, and we're gonna see the VIPERSAULT......ALREADY! BB: Here it comes....NO! FLAIR ROLLED OUT OF THE WAY! How he EVER got the prescence of mind to do that...Patrick Young counting down BOTH Flair and Steel Viper, and honestly, I don't know if Flair can get up...even after getting out of the way of the VIPERSAULT! RM: Still, it's better than being flatter than a pancake! BB: Point well taken. Steel Viper getting back to his feet, and Flair's still down! Viper pulls Flair to his feet, and NAILS him with a series of right and left hands, slumping him down in the corner....and VIPER FOLLOWS IT UP WITH A SAVATE KICK! Flair is getting DESTROYED here tonight, and it's all the fault of Scotty Michaels! RM: Flair might not even get to face Michaels....he's gotta get out of this match alive! BB: Steel Viper backs away from the corner, and Flair plops down to the canvas! Steel Viper going up to the second rope, and again, he's gonna try to put Steven Flair out of the CSWA.....here comes a SPLASH.....AND FLAIR MOVES AGAIN! Flair grabbing the ropes, and he's pulling himself to his feet! Flair with a CHOP on Viper....and ANOTHER! RM: That just ain't gonna work. BB: Steel Viper not feeling the affects, and he HAMMERS Flair back down to the canvas! Steel Viper gets behind Steven Flair, and sets him up....BIG BACK SUPLEX! A cover by Steel Viper, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Flair JUST got the foot on the ropes! Viper not all too happy about that, and he actually shoves Patrick Young! RM: He better be careful, or he'll be gone! BB: I'm not too sure about that, I BELIEVE a disqualification doesn't go along with the stipulation. Anyways, Steel Viper is completely manhandling Steven Flair! Viper sends him off the ropes, BIG CHOP, Flair ducks under! Flair back off the ropes....NO. Where's he going? Flair's OUTTA HERE....I think! RM: I don't think Steel Viper is just gonna let him leave! BB: Neither do I, since he's through the ropes! Steel Viper grabs Flair, and SLAMS HIM INTO THE RINGPOST! Viper's lost it, I think! He's setting up Flair on the floor....STEEL CURTAIN! AND ANOTHER! And now, Steel Viper's getting a table! I don't believe what we're seeing here! RM: Young doesn't, either. He's calling for the bell! BB: You're right! This one's over, and Steven Flair's going to get the DQ win, but right now, he isn't looking the part of a winner! Viper picks up the busted-open Flair, and he SLAMS him down on a table! Now, Steel Viper's going up top....oh no....you've gotta be kidding me! VIPERSAULT ONTO THE TABLE AND FLAIR.....HE HIT IT! Flair's out cold! We gotta get some medical attention for him! Viper laughs at Flair, spits on him, and STORMS off to the lockers....Flair has been left in a pool of blood on the arena floor! RM: NOW, I think I'm gonna puke..... BB: You do, and you're fired! I'd like to see you get another job.... RM: Well, I could always wear a Donald Duck costume at Disney World! BB: With your problems? I don't think so....medics are heading down to ringside, and now, they're taking Flair out of the ring on a stretcher...even with Flair's attitude, you can't help but feel bad for him today....he was set up by Scotty Michaels and Teri Melton, destroyed by them, and then destroyed again by Steel Viper! There's one thing that's for sure....Steven Flair CANNOT be a happy man right about now, and I think he's gonna be looking for revenge REAL soon! RM: Yeah, that's what Mad Mike said after we kicked his ass. (Burps...) I can't believe it....the whole case is already gone! How many matches do we have left? BB: Two! Up next, we've got the FORMER EN World Champion, GUNS, a man that CANNOT be happy after the man he thought was his best friend, HORNET, TURNED ON HIM back at WW VII and helped MARK WINDHAM win the EN World Championship and reformed AMERICA'S TEAM! Fans, we'll be right back! BB: GUNS will be stepping into the ring against a man we've seen ALOT of tonight...."Superstar" SCOTTY MICHAELS! Michaels lost the USN Championship to MIKE RANDALLS back at WW VII, and he's trying to get back on track as well! BUT, I've got to go with GUNS in this match, Rudy Seitzer tried to get an interview backstage, and GUNS slammed him into a wall....the man is NOT happy. RM: He should be! He's got his new four-year contract, and it's loaded with cash! BB: Hold on....I think we've got a disturbance going down outside of the arena....let's get this footage outside, in the parking lot.... ============================================================ (Robert Schmid in the parking lot, working out of his Chevy Nova as an impromptu souveneir stand....) SCHMID: C'mon....get your ADLER T-SHIRTS! I know the man ain't in the AAWC....but he's in the CSWA....and these babies MUST GO! They're sellin' like hotcakes....in fact, there's only 998 LEFT! GET 'EM NOW! But, if you don't want that....HOW ABOUT THIS! AAWC TRADING CARDS! They've got all of the superstars of the All-Action Wrestling Conference! Let's get a look at these things....here's one of TOM ADLER...and another one of TOM ADLER....there's a nice action shot of the ADLER-PLEX....and look, there's ADLER in the shower! (Stands stunned...) Ooops....I think I sent the wrong pictures in to print....well, as long as they don't find out about that peep-hole, I should be fine.....(Law and Order comes out.....) LAW and ORDER: Don't I remember you? Oh yeah....I do! You're that transvestite freak that tried to molest me! Where's your cantalopes now? SCHMID: You can't prove that.....that wasn't me.....yeah, that was my evil twin! That's the ticket..... LAW and ORDER: Officers of the law don't appreciate molesters...and we don't appreciate hawkers that hawk without a license! (Law and Order clubs Schmid down to the concrete, and picks up a set of the AAWC Trading Cards...... he flashes through them, and stops at one.....with a sick look on his face....he slams Schmid with the billy club in the head again....and turns over the Nova filled with AAWC merchandise....people all around look, and go to loot the car...but stop when they find out what's inside of it. Some of them see the Trading Cards....and begin to beat on Schmid....as Law and Order walks off, disgusted.....) ============================================================ BB: Whoa boy. Well, there's only one thing to say....that man, well, he's got problems. Peep-holes in the shower? Now I've heard everything....and you wonder why Adler didn't want to come back.... RM: That's just disgusting....the man should be ashamed of himself! BB: Let's take it down to ringside for ONE-HALF of our MAIN EVENT! ============================================================ GUNS vs. SCOTTY MICHAELS ============================================================ BB: We're ready to go here, and Michaels trying to get a last minute kiss in with Teri Melton....BUT GUNS WILL HAVE NONE OF THAT! GUNS turns Michaels around, and DROPS him with a left hand! Michaels back to his feet, and GUNS LEVELS HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE, FOLLOWED UP BY ANOTHER! GUNS sends Michaels in for the ride, HUGE POWERSLAM! A cover, ONE, TWO, ALMOST A THREE COUNT RIGHT THERE! RM: GUNS is fired up! Michaels better be careful here! BB: GUNS sends Michaels off the ropes, MILLITARY PRESS, and A SLAM DOWN TO THE CANVAS! Michaels staggering back up to his feet, and GUNS CLOTHESLINES HIM OVER THE TOP, and DOWN TO THE FLOOR! The crowd here in Greensboro is going wild as GUNS is DESTROYING Scotty Michaels! RM: Michaels trying to get a break on the outside, but I don't think GUNS is gonna give it to him! BB: GUNS following Michaels to the outside, we'll be back! BB: GUNS off the apron, AX-HANDLE on Michaels, NO! Michaels with a shot to the gut, and follows up with a KNEELIFT on the floor! Michaels grabs GUNS by the hair, and RUNS HIM INTO THE RINGPOST, WHOA MY! Michaels rolls GUNS into the ring, and he's grabbing the top rope....SLINGSHOT SPLASH, CONNECTS! ONE, TWO, GUNS out with a POWERFUL kickout! RM: I wish they'd hurry up....I want to hit the bar! BB: Another thing you can't see over. Scotty Michaels with a SCOOP, and he SLAMS GUNS down to the canvas, and that's not a particularly easy thing to do! Michaels AGAIN going up top, and you've gotta wonder if he's going to the well one too many times.....ELBOWDROP....and GUNS is out of the way! GUNS to his feet quickly, and he HAMMERS Michaels with forearms to the side of the head! GUNS sends Michaels off the ropes, LARIET! Michaels might be out! A cover, ONE, TWO, ALMOST A THREE COUNT! GUNS picks up Michaels, SNAP SUPLEX, NICELY EXECUTED! GUNS is all business here tonight, and he's taking it to Scotty Michaels. RM: Well, he's got an incredible power advantage in this match! BB: GUNS trying to turn over Michaels, BOSTON CRAB, can he do it....YES! Ben Worthington calling this match, and he's asking Michaels if he wants to give it up....but he won't! Michaels holding on, and GUNS is really rocking back, applying pressure to the "Superstar"! Michaels seems to be fading, and Worthington checks the arm, DROPS ONCE, DROPS TWICE, THREE TIMES....NO! Michaels gets the arm up! GUNS sees he's not going to get a submission out of this, and drops down across the back of Michaels, breaking the hold! RM: And possibly breaking his back! BB: GUNS picks up Michaels, SIDE BACK SUPLEX! GUNS has found a weak-spot here on Michaels, and he's really going to town on it! GUNS with a cover, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Michaels gets the shoulder up! GUNS with another cover, this time hooking the leg, ONE, TWO, THREE....MICHAELS JUST OUT! Another close call! GUNS brings Michaels back to his feet, WHIPS Michaels into the corner with authority, CHARGES IN WITH A CLOTHESLINE, YES! Michaels is out on his feet, and Teri Melton is screaming at him, hoping to get him back in it! GUNS putting Michaels up top, and NAILS him with a right to the jaw! RM: GUNS is gonna go for a SUPERPLEX! He might just break Michaels' back with this one! BB: GUNS going for the SUPERPLEX...but Michaels isn't going! Michaels with a KICK LOW! He KICKED GUNS LOW! GUNS breaks the hold and stumbles down to the canvas! Michaels shaking off the cob-webs, and he's climbing up top! GUNS getting back to his feet....MICHAELS OFF THE TOP WITH A SHOOTING STAR PRESS....HE GOT IT! ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! GUNS kicks out in the nick of time! Almost an upset right there! Michaels with stiff right and left hands on GUNS, but I don't know how much of an effect that's really going to have! Michaels sends GUNS off the ropes, and CONNECTS with a leaping elbow to the face! RM: And just like I said about GUNS' power....there's no doubt that Michaels is the more agile man! BB: GUNS staggering back to his feet, I don't think he even knows where Michaels is right about now! Michaels CRISS-CROSSING ON THE ROPES....AND HE HITS A FLYING FOREARM! GUNS is down, and he might be out cold! Michaels with a cover, ONE, TWO, ALMOST A THREE COUNT! GUNS just managed to get the foot on the ropes! Michaels pulling GUNS to his feet, sets him up....SLINGSHOT SUPLEX, IT CONNECTS! Scotty Michaels going up top, and we might see the beginning of the end right here! RM: I think Michaels is going for the HEARTBREAKER....if he can hit this, GUNS is gonna be a loser AGAIN! BB: Michaels off the top.....HEARTBREAKER, IT CONNECTS! A cover by Michaels, ONE, TWO, THREEEE.....NO! NO! GUNS GOT THE SHOULDER UP! The crowd's going wild, and Michaels can't believe it! I don't think ANYONE has kicked out of that move yet! Michaels is stunned, and he's going back up top! BB: Michaels DEFINATELY going to the well one too many times here, because GUNS is making it back to his feet! Michaels with a MOONSAULT....and GUNS MAKES THE CATCH! GUNS WITH A TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER! I DON'T BELIEVE IT! Michaels is out cold! All GUNS has to do is cover Michaels, and it's over! GUNS with the cover, ONE, TWO, THREE.....WHAT THE HELL? RM: I think Melton put the foot on the ropes! BB: SHE HAD TO! Scotty Michaels was out cold! GUNS can't believe it, but I don't think he'd hit a woman....well, maybe he would, because he's pulling Teri Melton up onto the ring apron....Teri screaming loudly, and the whole crowd here is standing....they want GUNS to knock her block off! RM: Forget hitting her! GUNS should go for a cheap feel! BB: You know, you're incredible. You're like a minature Sammy Benson in a Halloween costume! GUNS asking for approval, and he's gonna NAIL TERI....wait a second, Michaels is back up, and he taps GUNS on the shoulder, GUNS TURNS AROUND, thinking it's Worthington....AND MICHAELS SUPERKICKS HIM! GUNS goes down like a ton of bricks, and Michaels covers.....WAIT A SECOND, TERI'S GOT GUNS' LEG! ONE, TWO, THREE!!! MICHAELS GETS THE WIN, and Teri Melton was holding down GUNS' leg....keeping him from kicking out! I don't believe it! Michaels quickly scoots under the bottom rope and runs back to the lockers with Teri, his hand raised in victory! GUNS has been screwed out of another match, I don't believe it! RM: Oh well....there isn't a whole lot I can do about it. I'm only 3 feet tall! BB: If that. GUNS back to his feet, and he is NOT a happy camper....I wouldn't want to have to meet up with him back in the lockerooms....he's liable to kill, after he took out Seitzer backstage! Now, we've got to take a break, and then we'll have the OTHER HALF of our DOUBLE MAIN-EVENT, as the "Perfect Package" SCOTT WATERS returns to action....but he doesn't have an easy opponent....AT ALL, as he faces off against "Mr. Magnificent" TOM ADLER in a BEST 2 out of 3 FALLS MATCH! That's right...we've got TOM ADLER....not TOM ADLER T-SHIRTS....we'll be right back! BILL BUCKLEY: RED, what a match we just saw! Scotty Michaels pulls out the upset over GUNS! RED MIDGET: I wouldn't really call this an upset, Bill! BILL BUCKLEY: After losing his USN title at WW7, you had to figure Michaels would be down..but he bounced back very nicely tonight! RED MIDGET: You gotta wonder how much the loss at WW7 is still bothering him...the HORNET turn shocked us all. BILL BUCKLEY: Both Michaels and GUNS will be aiming at the UNIFIED and EN World Championships. RED MIDGET: What time does the wet bar close? BILL BUCKLEY: Stop! Folks, Mark Windham recieved numerous challenges for his first EN title defense, but he's opted to host a public workout! RED MIDGET: You can't fault the man, for wanting to display his talents! BILL BUCKLEY: His talents have been on display since 1988. RED MIDGET: Good point, but still... BILL BUCKLEY: RED, Windham put you and another midget through a table! RED MIDGET: I'll kill'em! (Hey Man Nice Shot by Filter plays) BILL BUCKLEY: There go the lasers and lights...Mark Windham is making his way to ringside! Along with him, is the former UNIFIED World Champion HORNET! RED MIDGET: Maybe they're going to turn on some jobbers! BILL BUCKLEY: Maybe. Windham is in the ring..he takes off his leather jacket, and begins to get loose. The ref for this workout is Patrick Young! I wonder if he's received any checks from Mr.Windham! RED MIDGET: He tried to pay us off...but we midgets have high standards! BILL BUCKLEY: I never noticed this before, but you truely are an idiot! RED MIDGET: That's ok..don't spare my feelings. BILL BUCKLEY: The first opponent in the workout, will be Ricky 'sweetcakes' Worthington! Ricky, has well...not won very many matches! RED MIDGET: Don't sugarcoat it Bill, he's won two! BILL BUCKLEY: Ok..so he's not on Tom Adler's level. RED MIDGET: He's not on Space God's level! BILL BUCKLEY: Worthington in the ring, there's the bell! Ricky, locks up Windham in the center of the ring....Windham with a knee to the mid-section, and an IMPLANT DDT! OHMY (Public workout cont...) BILL BUCKLEY: Worthington is in trouble after that IMPLANT DDT! Windham to his feet, and he's strutting around the ring...why couldn't he defend his title tonight! RED MIDGET: If ifs and buts were candy and nuts we'd all have a wonderful christmas! BILL BUCKLEY: What in the sam hill does that mean? RED MIDGET: How should I know...I read it off of a AAWC trading card. BILL BUCKLEY: That explains a lot. Windham helps Ricky to his feet, and drops him with a neckbreaker! This is a disgrace! RED MIDGET: I agree...that neckbreaker was poorly executed! Come on Mark work the man over! BILL BUCKLEY: You're terrible. Windham lifts Worthington up, he's got him in the TORTURE RACK! Mark has finished many a match with that move! RED MIDGET: Stick a fork in him he's done! BILL BUCKLEY: Patrick Young calls for the bell, Ricky is indeed over! Let's hope this is the end to the public workout! RED MIDGET: Hope again! Here comes Zeke Weasel! BILL BUCKLEY: I don't know why, Mark wants to workout on a 400 lb man! Zeke is in, and Windham jumps on him! Why not give the guy a fair shake! Geez.. RED MIDGET: The man is 400 lbs for crying out loud! It could have taken him a half hour to get in the ring! BILL BUCKLEY: Windham whips Zeke off the ropes, and catches the big guy with a Lariat! Windham...lifts Zeke off his feet, body slam! OHMY! RED MIDGET: Windham isn't even breaking a sweat! I love this! BILL BUCKLEY: I hear he's working out on a midget, next! RED MIDGET: This debacle must be stopped!! BILL BUCKLEY: I thought you'd change your tune! Mark tries to suplex Zeke, but Weasel turns the tables and suplexes Windham! What is this! The crowd loves it! Zeke with a clothesline, and another! RED MIDGET: Something has gone, terribly, terribly wrong! BILL BUCKLEY: Windham is on the mat, Zeke bounces off the ropes setting up for his finisher the big splash! WAIT A MINUTE!! On the outside, HORNET trips Zeke up!!! RED MIDGET: I didn't see anything, then again...I can hardly see over the monitor. BILL BUCKLEY: Zeke, turns to look at HORNET, and Mark nails him from behind! Windham with a IMPLANT DDT!! The cover, ONE....TWO.....THREE!! I don't believe this! HORNET tosses Windham a towel, so he can get wipe away the drops of sweat. RED MIDGET: I think Mark is getting in shape, who is are next contestant! (Public workout cont...) BILL BUCKLEY: It's a sad day when you have to cheat to beat a jobber! Hopefully this has come to an end! RED MIDGET: HORNET has stepped into the ring, Bill..so maybe it's coming to a close. BILL BUCKLEY: HORNET has grabbed the house mic, he might be challenging the EN Champion! HORNET: Mark, I think we've all enjoyed watching you show us your stuff tonight..you've proven why you're the best there is! However, if I may be so bold, I'd like to bring out a kid, who I've had my eye on for some time! He's got a lot of RAW talent, and being out here tonight with you, would be the thrill of his life! MARK WINDHAM: Bring it on! HORNET: Ladies and Gentlemen, here is the HWA US Heavyweight champion, a former CSWL find..."The Golden Boy" Paul Pierce! (Crowd cheers) BILL BUCKLEY: I certainly didn't expect this! RED MIDGET: Paul Pierce...never heard of him..but let's see what he can do! BILL BUCKLEY: Pierce makes his way into the ring. He shakes HORNET's hand! Windham, and Pierce standing toe-to-toe! Mark Windham just slapped his face! RED MIDGET: Mr.Pierce I'm ready for my close-up!! BILL BUCKLEY: Pierce popped Windham in the head! Mark jumps up, he takes a swing at Pierce! Paul ducks, belly to back suplex! RED MIDGET: Uh, what's going on here? BILL BUCKLEY: Pierce, inside cradle...ONE...TWO...NO! Pierce with a belly to belly suplex! This is wild! Windham rakes the eyes! RED MIDGET: This might get out of hand! BILL BUCKLEY: Mark is livid, he's all over the "Golden Boy"! Windham hammering Pierce with repeated blows to the head! Pierce rolls Mark over and now he's working over Mark! RED MIDGET: Ok, I've seen enough! BILL BUCKLEY: Mark with a shot to Paul's groin! He rolls outside, to grab a chair! OHMY!.....HORNET enteres the ring! He yanks the chair out of Windy's hand! Pierce to his feet and he and Mark are exchanging words! RED MIDGET: I think it's safe to say, the workout is over! BILL BUCKLEY: You would think so! Windham just shoved Pierce to the mat...he says something to HORNET, and the two of them leave! RED MIDGET: Well, something happened here tonight, but since I can't see a darn thing I don't know what it was! BILL BUCKLEY: We'll sort this out later...it's time for our MAIN EVENT! Tom Adler vs Scott Waters 2 out of 3 falls! Plus, we'll try and get a word on Wild Asian's condition! BILL BUCKLEY: That was uh...a very intersting workout by Mark Windham! RED MIDGET: Paul Pierce, what's up with that? BILL BUCKLEY: Fans, right now..standing by at Wesley Long Hospital is Stan Parsons! Stan! ============================================================ STAN PARSONS: Bill, I've good news. I just spoke with Wild Asian's doctors. As we all saw earlier he took a nasty spill on a table...from what I understand, it was only a 'stinger'. No serious damage was done. The X-rays turned out to be ok, and it looks as if the kid will be able to wrestle pretty soon! He seems to be in good spirits! Once again, the Wild Asian is alive and well! ============================================================ BILL BUCKLEY: Thanks Stan! RED it's time for our Main Event of the evening! RED MIDGET: This one should be wild! I need a drink.... ============================================================ Scott Waters vs Tom Adler 2 out of 3 falls BILL BUCKLEY: These two men have a past history in other leagues, and here in the CSWA! A couple of years back, it was the "Perfect Package" Scott Waters who defeated Adler in a loser leaves the CSWA match! Since that time Tom has been allowed back in the ring, and the league is better for it! RED MIDGET: Let's not forget, at WW7 Scott made his return by attacking Tom! Then in the UT he played a huge role in getting Adler knocked out of the tourney! BILL BUCKLEY: All of that amounts to what should be one heck of a fight! Tom Adler, has already entered the ring, he's awaiting the arrival of Waters! (The Perfect crime by G'n'R plays) BILL BUCKLEY: Here comes Scott Waters!! He looks cocky RED! RED MIDGET: He should be, for one he's tall, for another he's a great wrestler! BILL BUCKLEY: Waters half way down the aisle....hey! What?!! Vince Bailey, Maxwell Diamond, and the <> Cutters have all jumped on Scott Waters!! RED MIDGET: You gotta love this! BILL BUCKLEY: Bailey sends Waters into the iron railing! OHMY! Ern Enderson with a DDT on the cement floor!! This is uncalled for! Tom Adler runs over...he's going to give Maxwell hell! RED MIDGET: Oh boy BILL BUCKLEY: NO!! Adler is joining in on the attack! He's tearing into Scott Waters!! It appears, Adler is back with the <> X-Change!! RED MIDGET: How'd you guess that!! BILL BUCKLEY: Ben Worthington is calling for some kind of order back there!! There's the bell, this match is underway! Oh, I don't believe it! (Adler/Waters cont..) BILL BUCKLEY: "Mr.Magnificent"Tom Adler carries Waters back into the ring! The man can't defend himself! RED MIDGET: We all have problems, Bill...you just have to suck it up and go on! BILL BUCKLEY: Adler climbs back into the ring! He's getting booed out of the building! Just when you thought it was safe to life this guy, he pulls this! RED MIDGET: It's a career move, Buckley! BILL BUCKLEY: Tom stomps away at Waters! Adler with a Double Arm Powerbomb! What a move! It'd be even more impressing if Waters hadn't been knocked senseless before hand! RED MIDGET: Details..details! BILL BUCKLEY: Adler sets up, he's going to end the first fall right here!! RED MIDGET: Whoop! There it is! BILL BUCKLEY: ADLERPLEX!!!! We've seen that many, many times before! ONE.......TWO......THREE!!!! Tom Adler wins the first fall of the match!! RED MIDGET: This is as good as over..I don't care who you are, you're not going to beat Tom Adler two straight falls! BILL BUCKLEY: That's the task that lies ahead for Scott Waters! He's got another 30 seconds to rest up! Or better yet, regain his senses! What a cheap way to score a fall! RED MIDGET: It's a sick world out there, and to survive you have to be a member of the Manson family! Tom Adler just showed..he's atleast a first cousin! BILL BUCKLEY: What? RED MIDGET: It sounded good.... BILL BUCKLEY: The bell rings, fall two is underway! As expected Tom Adler stays on the attack! Tom sits on Waters' back with a camel clutch! RED MIDGET: He could pin the man now, if he really wanted! BILL BUCKLEY: Adler has the camel clutch sinched in pretty tight! Look at Diamond on the outside..isn't he just the happiest man on the face of the earth! RED MIDGET: He should be...he pulled a fast one tonight! BILL BUCKLEY: Tom finally releases the hold..Adler whips Waters into the corner! Scott Waters catches Adler with an elbow!! That came out of nowhere!! RED MIDGET: He's alive! He's alive! BILL BUCKLEY: The Merritt Auditorium is going wild, they've rallied behind "The Pefect Package" (Waters/Adler cont....) BILL BUCKLEY: Waters flings Adler to the outside!! This could get nasty in a matter of seconds! RED MIDGET: You're not kidding, Waters has a chair in hand! Say No to Midget Violence Scott!! BILL BUCKLEY: He's not going to hit you....well I think not! RED MIDGET: I'm outta here! BILL BUCKLEY: Get back here you goof! Waters has that chair and he bends it over Tom's head! You could hear that one loud and clear! Waters turns around and cracks it up against Maxwell Diamond! RED MIDGET: That's not allowed is it? BILL BUCKLEY: It's not suppose to be, but oh well! Waters, who already, is a bloody mess drops Adler over the iron railing! He may have cracked a few ribs! RED MIDGET: I wouldn't doubt it! BILL BUCKLEY: Scott fires Adler up against the iron post!! Waters brings the action back inside the ring! RED it's evident these two hate each other! RED MIDGET: I heard you were a smart one, but this just proves it! BILL BUCKLEY: Scott with a slingshot suplex!! Cover, ONE...TWO....NO!! Waters has Tom Adler in the corner..to the second rope, he's pounding on Adler's head! ONE..TWO..THREE..FOUR..FIVE..SIX..SEVEN..EIGHT..NINE..TEN TIMES!! RED MIDGET: He's just beating the snot out of Adler! BILL BUCKLEY: That's one way of putting it! Waters catches Adler off the ropes with a spinning wheelhouse kick! I didn't know he had that one in his bag of tricks! RED MIDGET: What a match! These fans deserve a 3rd set! BILL BUCKLEY: This isn't tennis, you goof. Waters...looking for the pinfall....PILEDRIVER!! RED MIDGET: That's one way to go about getting it! BILL BUCKLEY: Waters to the top rope!!! But, Adler is up quickly and he meets him there! Both men wrestling for position...Waters shoves Tom off the ropes! RED MIDGET: This booster chair isn't working, I can't see a thing! BILL BUCKLEY: Scott flies off the top, TR BULLDOG! OHMY! ONE.....TWO....THREE!!! SCOTT WATERS HAS SCORED A PINFALL! And we're dead even at one fall a piece! RED MIDGET: I told you, there would be a 3rd set! BILL BUCKLEY: Both men will get a final 60 second rest period, before the final fall begins! RED MIDGET: I said it before, Waters had a TALL order ahead of him after losing the first fall, he's gotten the second one, can he get two in a row! (Waters/Adler cont...) BILL BUCKLEY: The rest period has ended..and it's Waters with the upperhand..sending Adler into the ropes, flying dropkick! RED MIDGET: At this point Bill it all comes down to who wants it more! BILL BUCKLEY: Waters rams Adler's head into the turnbuckle! Waters has Adler up, snap suplex! Waters has the figure 4!! He's got the figure 4 on Tom Adler!! RED MIDGET: I smell trouble for Diamond and his man!! BILL BUCKLEY: The figure 4 is quickly broken, as Maxwell Diamond pulls Adler to the ropes! It helps to have a man like that, on your side! RED MIDGET: Hey, he gets paid to make sure Adler wins, he's just doing his job! BILL BUCKLEY: Adler up and he rakes the eyes! Tom with a scoop slam! He's been beaten down, over the last 15 minutes or so! RED MIDGET: As this point, I think Adler is breathing a little heavier than Waters! BILL BUCKLEY: Adler on the attack as he whips Waters into the ropes, and nails him with a double ax handle! Waters gives Tom a shot to the groin! He didn't waste any time in delivering that blow! RED MIDGET: I'm too nervous I can't watch this one..I need a drink to settle my nerves! BILL BUCKLEY: Waters clotheslines Adler over the ropes!! Both men go over, and hit hard on the cement floor!! Diamond quickly on the apron!! What's he doing!! RED MIDGET: I don't know, but he's got the refs attention!! BILL BUCKLEY: Look at this!! Vince Bailey has made his way out of the dressing rooms! Bailey reaches in his tights, he's putting on a glove! A loaded glove! RED MIDGET: Maybe his hand his cold! BILL BUCKLEY: Bailey knocks Waters' head off using that loaded glove! What's going on here!! Adler is rolled back into the ring, as Bailey runs away! RED MIDGET: The ref is beginning to count!!! BILL BUCKLEY: Adler is out of it, in the middle of the ring...and so is Waters! But he's on the outside!! Worthington is up to 5...Waters will be counted out!! RED MIDGET: Bar the door Katie! BILL BUCKLEY: It's over!!! Scott Waters has been counted out!! Thanks to Vince Bailey! Where's Merritt when you need him, or Thomas for that matter! RED MIDGET: In the spa with two women, maybe? BILL BUCKLEY: Not likely..folks we're flush out of time! We'll see you this weekend, for Day 2 of the 1996 ANNIVERSARY Celebration: Hot Southern Days and Rock and Roll Nights!! Seeya! DAY TWO! (CSWA logo appears on the screen...catches on fire and burst into tiny pieces) FADEIN: To the sold out, Merritt Auditorium! 15,000 fans are going wild, holding up banners and signs! One kid is spotting with a sign that reads, "President Poop must Die!" CUTTO: Bill Buckley and the RED Midget are standing in front of a sea of fans! ============================================================ BILL BUCKLEY: Hello fans, I'm Bill Buckley! It's Day two of the month long, 1996 ANNIVERSARY Celebration: Hot Southern Days and Rock'n'Roll Nights! We've got a ton of action for you today...which is highlighted by the UNIFIED Tag Team Title match-up...and the fued rolls on, HORNET vs Mike Randalls! RED MIDGET: Thanks to a few phone books, I'm pleased to announce I can now see the action! BILL BUCKLEY: Goody! RED, we're not going to waste any time...let's go to the ring, and Rhubarb Jones! ============================================================ TERMINATOR vs "Hot Stuff" Eddie Lawerence w/Miss Tori BILL BUCKLEY: Eddie Lawerence is making his debut in the CSWA! We've heard a lot about the guy, and finally we're going to see him in action! TERMINATOR the guy was a bodyguard for Scott Michaels, but they've had a parting of ways! RED MIDGET: Michaels got the snot knocked out of him! BILL BUCKLEY: You have a way with words, I'll say that much for you! RED MIDGET: Awww...stop BILL BUCKLEY: Eddie is managed by the beautiful Miss Tori! The CSWA certainly has it's share of women managers..and Tori fits the bill if you know what I mean! RED MIDGET: You're so transparent! BILL BUCKLEY: Thank you, I think...There's the bell, Eddie and the Terminator lock up in the center of the ring! Terminator, shows just how powerful he is, by scooping up Lawerence and slamming him down to the mat! RED MIDGET: This is guy is huge....but he's got a Midget's heart! BILL BUCKLEY: Terminator whips Eddie into the ropes, and stuns him with a shoulderblock! Lawerence is giving up a tremendous advantage in size and weight...it's going to be tough for him to find a way to win! RED MIDGET: You've got to chop the man down by using groin shots! BILL BUCKLEY: That's enough! Terminator picks Lawerence over his head, and drops him over the top rope! What a shot! (Lawerence/Terminator cont...) BILL BUCKLEY: Terminator picks up Lawerence and drops him over the turnbuckle! Right now RED, he's tossing him away like a rag doll! RED MIDGET: Rag doll? Is that another midget joke? BILL BUCKLEY: Don't start...Lawerence fires back with several rights..but Terminator just shakes the blows off! The big man slings Eddie into the ropes, and catches him with a big boot! RED MIDGET: Here comes the leg drop of doom!! BILL BUCKLEY: Don't go there! Terminator with a leg drop!! Wow, you were right! RED MIDGET: But of course! BILL BUCKLEY: Terminator again sends Eddie into the ropes, attempts a clothesline, but Lawerence ducks and nails the big man in the head with a fore arm shiver! That seemed to rock him just a bit! RED MIDGET: He's still on his feet!! BILL BUCKLEY: Lawerence with a dropkick...he sets up again, and delivers yet another!!! This time it drops Terminator to his knees!! RED MIDGET: And he's still taller than me!! BILL BUCKLEY: Lawerence with a DDT!! He's finally stunned the big guy...Eddie jumps on Terminator's back with a sleeper hold!! RED MIDGET: Goodnight!! BILL BUCKLEY: Eddie is wearing him down!! The fans are going wild..they want to see Terminator put to sleep!!! OH! Terminator fell backwards, and Eddie crashes into the corner! RED MIDGET: Were those ribs I heard cracking? BILL BUCKLEY: I think so!! Terminator rams a few elbows into Lawerence's head! Terminator irish whipes Eddie to the opposite corner! He follows him in, but Eddie moves out of the way!! Small package....ONE....TWO.....THREE!!! Eddie Lawerence defeats Terminator!! RED MIDGET: Wow..this is a shocker... BILL BUCKLEY: Eddie Lawerence debuts with a victory!! At times it looked to be in doubt, but he managed to pull it off! BILL BUCKLEY: Welcome back, folks! RED, what a big win for Eddie Lawerence! RED MIDGET: Big? Heck it's huge! A lot bigger than me, that's for sure! BILL BUCKLEY: You really have a problem, son.. RED MIDGET: Yeah, and you're mother is my secret lover! ============================================================ LUNACY VS IRONMAN BILL BUCKLEY: Two newcomers and set to square off! Ironman starts is off with a savat kick! Ironman, snap mare! He slings Lunacy off the ropes, and clobbers him with a forearm! RED MIDGET: As Dusty would say, 'Clubberin'! BILL BUCKLEY: You're so fired... RED MIDGET: What?! BILL BUCKLEY: Ironman looking to win it all, right here! BILL BUCKLEY: This might be a mistake RED! RED MIDGET: Might? BILL BUCKLEY: Ironman off the top, but Lunacy catches him and there's a powerslam! He got the big man, and dropped him like a sack of potatoes! RED MIDGET: Give me a J.... BILL BUCKLEY: Stop! Lunacy whips Ironman into the corner, and follows with a clothesline!! RED MIDGET: Ironman is getting the short end of the stick right now! BILL BUCKLEY: You're horrible...Lunacy, executes a tombstone piledriver!! He's setting up for the big one! He's going to the top rope! RED MIDGET: NO! Not the top rope!! BILL BUCKLEY: Lunacy with a flying body press!! ONE....TWO. .....THREE!!! He got'em! RED MIDGET: What a match! BILL BUCKLEY: Lunacy scores the pinfall in this one! BILL BUCKLEY: Lunacy gets a win, and RED he's going to keep moving up that CSWA ladder! RED MIDGET: Yeah, he's only ranked 105 now... who knows how many spots he'll climb after beating a man who's not ranked! BILL BUCKLEY: Boy, you're just a bitter little man aren't you? RED MIDGET: Bitter this! BILL BUCKLEY: I'll pass...Right now, one of Sammy Benson's personal favorites...the Space God is set to take on Aaron Reno! ============================================================ Space God vs Aaron Reno BILL BUCKLEY: Space God opens things with a hip toss, and a dropkick that sends Reno flying over the top ropes! Space is wasting no time! RED MIDGET: Space, the Final Frontier! BILL BUCKLEY: Thanks Kirk...Space God on the outside with Reno!! He fires Aaron into the iron railing! Space again sends Reno's head crashing into the railing! RED MIDGET: Space looks like a new man tonight! Don't get me wrong, he stil stinks..but you know BILL BUCKLEY: Yeah, I know...Reno rakes the eyes, and manages to roll back into the ring! Aaron takes SG by the hair, and pulls him up on the apron! RED MIDGET: Do birds pee? BILL BUCKLEY: I hate my life... RED MIDGET: I'll ask someone else.... BILL BUCKLEY: Reno suplexes Space God back into the ring! That took a lot of strenght right there! Reno scoops SG up, and slams him down! Aaron with a figure 4!! RED MIDGET: This could be it, right here!! BILL BUCKLEY: It might be!! RED MIDGET: It could be... BILL BUCKLEY: It is!! Sorry...Space God, reaches the ropes, and Reno is forced to break it! (Reno/Space God cont....) BILL BUCKLEY: Reno quickly to his feet...and he stomps away at Space God's head! Aaron fires Space into the ropes, powerslam!! RED MIDGET: Oh my! BILL BUCKLEY: Reno going to the top rope! This must be high flyer night! RED MIDGET: Let me check..yes it is! Moron.... BILL BUCKLEY: Reno to the top, but Space God is up there with him! Space launches Reno off the top, and Aaron smacks against the mat! RED MIDGET: He got some serious hangtime on that one, Bill, and believe me I know about hangtime! BILL BUCKLEY: Let's not get into your dwarf tossing stories! RED MIDGET: But? BILL BUCKLEY: Space God charges Reno and nails him with a clothesline!! Space with a DDT, NO! Aaron grabs the ropes, and SG falls down! RED MIDGET: Look at Rosenthal he loved that one! He's a nice man...I met him before the show.. BILL BUCKLEY: That's nice..Aaron swinging neckbreaker! He's got it in gear right now! Reno picks SG up...backbreaker! RED MIDGET: He just got an adjustment, free of charge! BILL BUCKLEY: No kidding...Reno hooks the tights, lifts Space God up slingshot suplex! This kid has it all! RED MIDGET: Yeah, but he's got Rosenthal as a manager, so how far can he really go? BILL BUCKLEY: Good point.. RED MIDGET: I try. BILL BUCKLEY: Reno again hooks the tights, lifts Space God up...PERFECTPLEX! He's got that leg hooked! ONE....TWO... THREEE!!!!! Aaron Reno wins it with a perfectplex!! RED MIDGET: Say what you will about Rosenthal, Reno has talent! BILL BUCKLEY: That, he certainly does! BILL BUCKLEY: Thus far, we've seen some of the newer talent CS Enterprises has brought in! That's what makes the CSWA so exciting these days, we've got a great mix of young stars, and superb veterans! RED MIDGET: Don't forget Muppets, Midgets, and more! BILL BUCKLEY: I'm trying my hardest to forget! RED MIDGET: Anyways, back to the card, let me tell you one thing..I'm excited about seeing Co-president Merritt in a 35ft steel cage, alongside of Maxwell Diamond! BILL BUCKLEY: That's right, RED you're talking about tonight's UNIFIED Tag Team Title defense! The Disco Express will be taking on the <> Cutters! RED MIDGET: They've had a bit of fued in the past, and tonight...I feel we'll see new UNIFIED Tag team champions! BILL BUCKLEY: Maybe. RED, let's remind the folks at home, the two cages are to insure that one team wins fairly! 35 ft in the air, and Diamond can't do anything, and that goes for Merritt too! RED MIDGET: I'm more concerned about that cheat Merritt! He'll figure out something! BILL BUCKLEY: He always does...also a little bit later on, we'll see Razorback and Anarky in a cage death match! RED MIDGE: Cage death match? I don't even want to know! BILL BUCKLEY: Plus our Main Event, HORNET and Randalls! They had one of the greatest fueds of '95..and now they're going at it again! RED MIDGET: Blood will be shed, for sure! ============================================================ LionTamer vs Technician Both men are new to the CSWA...both also looking to move their way up. This match started out very fast paced, with the Liontamer and the Technician giving the crowd a treat of true wrestling! The action then became somewhat of a brawl! It was at that time, that the LionTamer had the upperhand! It didn't take too long for the Technician to regain control of the match..he shook up the effects of some very devasting moves by the Liontamer and put away his opponent with a barrage of aerial moves! Winner: THE TECHNICIAN BILL BUCKLEY: RED, it's time for some tag team action! Via their win in the Triangular tag match, the Masters of Misery are in line for a title shot...but tonight they have to get past the former US Tag Team champions NC-17! RED MIDGET: That's easy said than done...those boys play rough! Heck they even drove a few midgets through a table or two not long ago! BILL BUCKLEY: When was this? RED MIDGET: Shut up, and go along with it...makes for good print! BILL BUCKLEY: Maybe President Schmid has room for one more! RED MIDGET: I heard that! BILL BUCKLEY: Huh?... ============================================================ Masters of Misery vs NC-17 BILL BUCKLEY: It's Pain and Tsuamni starting out for their respective teams! Tsuami tackles Pain...he's going for the juggular! NC-17 have said recently they want to turn up the heat even more, get more violent! RED MIDGET: More violent? Look at the man, Bill, he's biting Pain's face off! BILL BUCKLEY: Pain, slides outside, but Tsunami comes flying over the ropes, and splashes Pain into the iron railing! These two guys love high risk moves! RED MIDGET: You noticed that, did you? BILL BUCKLEY: Let's go little man!! RED MIDGET: Come on, and get ya some!! BILL BUCKLEY: Another time, another time! Uh..back to the action! Tsunami has a chair and he's using it to make dents in the MOM's head! RED MIDGET: He's doing a bang up job! BILL BUCKLEY: Who hired you anyway? RED MIDGET: I don't work for CS... BILL BUCKLEY: Geez....Tsunami makes the tag to Wildstar! Wildstar has the chair inside the ring, he leaps off the chair and bulldog's Pain!! OHMY (Masters of Misery/NC-17 cont...) BILL BUCKLEY: Speaking of the chair, Wildstar is ramming it into Pain's ribs! If you ask me, RED, NC-17 could be the most underrated team in the CSWA! RED MIDGET: Thank goodness no one is asking you! BILL BUCKLEY: Wildstar sends his man into the ropes, FRANK-N-PARSONS! RED MIDGET: That's a big time move! BILL BUCKLEY: Wildstar gets a two count on the cover! He makes a quick tag to Tsunami...They send Pain to the ropes, and clothesline him with the chair! RED MIDGET: Shouldn't that me a DQ? BILL BUCKLEY: Good question. Tsunami, backs Pain into his corner, and rams his should into the mid-section several times! 'Nami...whips Pain into the turnbuckle, OHMY! He just did a cartwheel, into a elbow smash! RED MIDGET: The man knows more moves, than Billy Dee Williams! BILL BUCKLEY: Gawd...Tsunami makes a tag to Wildstar...'Nami holds Pain...as Wildstar goes to the top rope! RED MIDGET: This can't be good! BILL BUCKLEY: Here comes Wildstar! NO..Pain manages to break free, and Wildstar clocks Tsunami with a double ax handle! RED MIDGET: Who called it!? BILL BUCKLEY: Pain dives, and makes the tag! Here comes Hurt! He's cleaning house! Hurt shoots Wildstar into the ropes, side-slam! RED MIDGET: He's going wild!! BILL BUCKLEY: Tsunami is tossed outside the ring... Wildstar is whipped into the turnbuckle...Hurt grabs Pain, and whips him up against Wildstar!! This could be the end! RED MIDGET: It's over...they've got the will to win! BILL BUCKLEY: Pain, has Wildstar up on his shoulders!!! Hurt going to the top...he comes off with a bulldog!! OH Doctor! RED MIDGET: Upset! Upset! BILL BUCKLEY: ONE......TWO.....THREE!!! I don't believe it, the Masters of Misery have upset NC-17!!! They've got that title shot on the way for sure!! RED, what a win! RED MIDGET: What they did tonight was no small feat! BILL BUCKLEY: What a tag match...Masters of Misery have a title shot coming to them, real soon! RED MIDGET: And won't the world be a better place for it! BILL BUCKLEY: What crawled up your butt and died... RED MIDGET: You don't want to know.. BILL BUCKLEY: Check please! RED MIDGET: Are we going to get this match started or what? BILL BUCKLEY: You can be fired you know... RED MIDGET: Sorry sir.. ============================================================ Japanese Assault vs S&M BILL BUCKLEY: Japanese Assault, another one of Rosenthal's family members, are also in line for a tag title shot! However, Frankie Mitchell and Tony Seebok have their eyes on gold as well! RED MIDGET: Gold? Belts are made of Gold? BILL BUCKLEY: Well, not if you're in the AAWC! *laugh* ============================================================ S&M vs Japanese Assault BILL BUCKLEY: The Kamikaza Kid and Tony Seebok start it off!! Seebok with a arm bar! But the Kid bounces off the ropes, and flips over! Arm drag! RED MIDGET: Yikes! BILL BUCKLEY: The Kid with a dropkick, but Seebok moves out of the way, and makes the quick tag to Frankie Mitchell! Mitchell belly to belly suplex! RED MIDGET: This is great tag action, but the Midget Maniacs could take either team! BILL BUCKLEY: Mitchell, rides the Kid into the ropes, Worthington calls for a clean break, but Frankie nails him with an open fist! RED MIDGET: Relax don't do it.... BILL BUCKLEY: Enough! Mitchell sends the Kamikaza Kid to the ropes, the Kid ducks the clothesline attempt and nails Mitchell with a spinning roundhouse kick! RED MIDGET: Geez!! BILL BUCKLEY: You said it! The Kid tags in Shogun Shotgun! Shotgun with flying leg scissors!! Shogun, drops Mitchell with a double thrust punch!! (Japenese Assault/S&M cont...) BILL BUCKLEY: Frankie Mitchell wrestles Shotgun to the mat...it's too S&M's advantage if they keep this at a slow pace! RED MIDGET: No wonder you win so many broadcasting awards, it's that insight of yours! BILL BUCKLEY: Mitchell tags in Tony Seebok...Tony with a DDT!! That seemed to come out of nowhere! RED MIDGET: These guys aren't half bad! BILL BUCKLEY: Only a two count, as Seebok went for the pin! Tony tags in Mitchell...shoots Shotgun into the ropes, drop toe hold...and Mitchell drops the elbow!! What great team work!! RED MIDGET: They do more by 6AM..than most BILL BUCKLEY: Don't...just don't. Mitchell fires Shotguns' head into the turnbuckle! Frankie sends Shogun to the opposite corner, but Shogun reverses and it's Mitchell who hits back first against the corner!! SUPERKICK!! RED MIDGET: That was a nice move...might even have dropped a midget! BILL BUCKLEY: Shogun reaches out and tags in the Kamikaza Kid!! The Kid with a chop to the head! The kid savat kicks Seebok and sends him flying over the top rope! RED MIDGET: Do you hear what I hear??!! BILL BUCKLEY: No RED MIDGET: Oh... BILL BUCKLEY: Shogun and the Kid dropkick on Mitchell!! Shogun flings Mitchell to the ropes, lies down on the mat, Frankie jumps over him, but is caught by a Frank-n-Parsons! RED MIDGET: I'm impressed...I'm impressed BILL BUCKLEY: This might be the beginning of the end! RED MIDGET: Smoke'em if you got'em! BILL BUCKLEY: Shogun a Piledriver on Mitchell! Shogun flies over the top rope and tackles Seebok on the outside! BILL BUCKLEY: The Kamikaza Kid is perched on the top rope, REVERSE MOONSAULT!! RED MIDGET: Holy Thunder! BILL BUCKLEY: Listen to this place erupt! ONE......TWO..... THREEE!!! That's it!! The Japanese Assault win another one! RED MIDGET: You said, if they win a title shot is near!! BILL BUCKLEY: Yeah, but I'm not the championship committee! RED MIDGET: Very true! BILL BUCKLEY: Up next..we've got Shane Matthews!!! BB: Fans, we're back, and let's keep the action coming! As you know, "Showtime" Shane Matthews was a member of the Rosenthal Family, before they turned their backs on him..... tonight, he'll be facing off against one of the Charter Members of the Family....the "Devil's Advocate" Thomas Dennison! RM: Well, Bill...this is gonna be a tough match to call. And not really because they're two closely matched competitors...you see, when you get drunk...and don't let it clear out of your system before drinking again...well, let's just say I'm not feeling too hot right about now. BB: Whoa boy....fans, let's take it down to ringside, this one should be interesting.... ============================================================ "Showtime" SHANE MATTHEWS vs. THOMAS DENNISON ============================================================ BB: We're ready to go here, and Dennison has his trusty pitchfork with him...you've got to wonder if that's gonna come into play! Here's a lock-up, and Matthews takes Dennison down to the canvas with a hiptoss! Dennison back up, and he gets a DROPKICK to the face! Dennison down to the canvas, and he's already in trouble here! RM: Whoa...the colors...man... BB: Oh, this is really too much. Where's my paid vacation? Dennison pulls himself back to his feet, but Matthews is ALL OVER HIM with a series of RIGHT HANDS! Matthews sends Dennison in for the ride...BIG BACK-BODYDROP! A cover, ONE, TWO, Dennison with the kickout! Matthews runs Dennison into the corner...CHARGES IN...and DENNISON PUTS UP THE BOOT! Dennison with a rake to the eyes, and he DECKS Matthews with a right hand! RM: Well, this Dennison is a tough guy...even if he isn't all that great of a wrestler! BB: Dennison locking in a chokehold on Matthews, the "Loose Cannon" of the CSWA...and Ben Worthington warning Thomas. I honestly think he really doesn't care. Dennison pulls Matthews to his feet, and SLAMS him down to the canvas! Dennison off the ropes, and he lands a stomp to the head, and again Dennison back to the chokehold! RM: I think he wants to get himself DQ'ed... BB: If he keeps this up, he certainly will be! Dennison finally breaks the choke, and sets up Matthews, SNAP SUPLEX, nicely done! When he wants to, Dennison CAN wrestle! Dennison going for a cover, ONE, TWO, NO! You're gonna have to do more than that to put Shawn Matthews away! Dennison sends Michaels off the ropes....LARIET....NO! Matthews ducks under, and Dennison goes tumbling through the ropes to the outside! RM: Finally...now, I can see one of the wrestlers! BB: Red, it's not our problem that you're 3 feet tall! Matthews grabbing the ropes, what are we gonna see here.... A PLANCHA, and it CONNECTS! Matthews ALL over Dennison, hammering him with right and left hands on the floor! Now, Matthews SLAMMING Dennison's head into the concrete again and again...he's INCENSED! RM: Here comes Rosenthal, and I don't think that's too bright of an idea! BB: Rosenthal hits Matthews from behind, and Matthews spins around....WHOA MY, HE ALMOST DECAPITATED ROSENTHAL WITH A SUPERKICK! Fans, we'll be right back! BB: We're back, and Matthews rolls Dennison into the ring, a cover...ONE, TWO, Dennison gets the foot on the ropes! No doubt, that attack by Matthews on the outside took it's toll! Matthews sends Dennison off the ropes, BIG LEAPING ELBOW TO THE FACE! Matthews pulls Dennison to his feet, GUTWRENCH SUPLEX....INTO A POWERBOMB, ONE, TWO, THREE...NO! DENNISON SOMEHOW FOUND A WAY OUT THE BACK DOOR! RM: What a move! I'll tell you, this Matthews is pretty impressive! BB: And now, he seems to be inspired! Matthews SLAMS Dennison down to the canvas, and he's going up top....he might be looking to put this one away! Dennison trying to get back to his feet, but he's really struggling....MATTHEWS FROM THE TOP WITH A FLYING BODYPRESS....YES, BUT DENNISON ROLLS THROUGH! ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! MATTHEWS JUST OUT! RM: Dennison had the tights....but, hey, what do I care? They don't pay me to stop that stuff anymore! BB: Matthews still keeps control with a HUGE chop to the midsection of Dennison! Dennison staggered against the ropes, and we could be seeing the beginning of the end for Dennison! Matthews sends him in for the ride....FRANK N PARSONS....NO! DENNISON HOLDS ON TO THE TOP ROPE, and Matthews goes crashing down! RM: I'll give Dennison credit where credit is due....that was a really smart move! BB: Matthews holding his head as he gets back to his feet, and Dennison charges up to him....SWINGING NECKBREAKER! That'll only make matters worse....Dennison not going for a cover, instead he chooses to choke away at the fallen Matthews yet again! Now, Dennison sends Matthews into the corner, and CHARGES IN WITH A RUNNING KNEE! Matthews slumps down to the canvas, and that might be all for him tonight! RM: He looks like me after a case too many! BB: Dennison finally drops down for the cover, and hooks the leg, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! MATTHEWS JUST GETS THE SHOULDER UP! Dennison had his arm raised in victory, but Worthington pulls it down! Dennison arguing with Worthington...but he finally turns his attentions to Matthews and pulls him into the center of the ring! RM: He's gonna put him away with a submission! BB: I think you're right, Red. Dennison going for a BOSTON CRAB...but Matthews isn't going! Matthews continues to block, and LOOK AT THAT! He just nailed Dennison with a solid right hand! Matthews vaults to his feet....Shane Matthews is coming back! Matthews with a series of right hands followed by a BACK-BRAIN KICK, and Dennison is down on the canvas! Matthews going for a cover, ONE, TWO, THREE ...NO! Rosenthal is back up, and he put the foot on the ropes! RM: I guess Rosenthal didn't learn the first time! BB: I guess not, because Shane Matthews is pulling him up onto the apron....BIG RIGHT HAND, and Rosenthal is out again! Worthington instructing Matthews to back away, but wait a second....Dennison fishing around for something on the outside.... RM: I think he's looking for his pitchfork! BB: You're right! Worthington checking on Rosenthal, and Matthews turns Dennison around....WHOA, MY GOD! BB: Dennison just NAILED Matthews in the HEAD with the pitchfork! Matthews crashes down to the canvas, Red, he's out could! Dennison taps Worthington on the shoulder, and drops down for a cover, ONE, TWO, THREE!!! It's over, and the "Devil's Advocate" Thomas Dennison picks up the victory! I don't believe how he pulled this one off, though.... RM: Matthews is lucky that he didn't get poked in the eye! Man, that would have been ugly! BB: Matthews still down on the canvas as Dennison and Rosenthal make their way back to the lockers, I still can't believe what just transpired! That's the kind of action you get in the CSWA....where the MIDGETS PLAY! ============================================================ (Cut to: Footage of the Red Midget Midget DDT'ing Sammy Benson on the concrete....) ============================================================ RM: Hey, I like that! Let's roll it again...and again! BB: Um, no...we don't have the time...because we've got to take it back down to ringside for some TAG-TEAM ACTION! ============================================================ CS EXPRESS vs. The MASKED ASSASSINS ============================================================ BB: Morton and Gibson haven't been going through the greatest run of their career, and let me tell you, Scope and Bullet, the FORMER Unified World Tag Team Champions, they're gonna be a tough test tonight! Looks like Chad Gibson's going to start this one off, and he'll be facing off against Bullet! A lock-up, and Bullet sends Gibson down to the canvas! RM: You talk about the CS Express being in a slump, when's the last time the Masked Assassins have beaten ANYONE! BB: Well, they haven't exactly been on fire themselves. Bullet with a side-headlock on Gibson, but Gibson sends him off the ropes! Gibson going for a SHOULDERBLOCK, I don't think so! Bullet runs him over and sends him down to the canvas! Bullet off the ropes, LEVELS GIBSON WITH A CLOTHESLINE! Bullet with a cover, ONE, TWO, NO! Gibson with the easy kickout! RM: You're gonna have to do more than that to beat the CS Express...but, if this match goes any longer, I'm gonna need myself another case! BB: Whatever you say. Bullet WHIPS Gibson into the corner with authority...CHARGES IN WITH A CLOTHESLINE, NO! GIBSON PUTS UP THE BOOT! Bullet staggered, and a GIBSON DROPKICK SENDS HIM DOWN TO THE CANVAS! Gibson with an armdrag! Gibson's on fire! Gibson sends Bullet in for the ride, FRANK-N-PARSONS....WHOA MY! A cover, ONE, TWO, THREE...NO! Broken up by Scope! RM: Well, there's no doubt that the CS Express is one of the most acrobatic teams around today! BB: Worthington forcing Scope back into the corner, and now, Gibson with a SNAP SUPLEX, nicely done! Gibson makes the tag to Steve Morton, and he's going up top! Morton waiting for Bullet to get back to his feet....SHOOTING STAR PRESS.....NO! BULLET MAKES THE CATCH, AND POWERSLAMS HIM DOWN TO THE CANVAS! RM: We might see another HUGE upset right here! BB: Bullet is worn down, finally covers, ONE, TWO, THREE.... NO! Morton managed to get the shoulder up! Bullet reaching to the corner, he MAKES THE TAG to SCOPE! Scope sends Morton off the ropes....BIG FLYING CLOTHESLINE, WHOA MY! BB: Steve Morton JUST in the ring, and he's already in trouble! Scope picks up Morton, and DROPS him to the canvas with a BACK SUPLEX! Cover by Scope, ONE, TWO, ALMOST A THREE COUNT! Morton better get some offense in soon, or he's gonna be history! Scope pulls Morton to his feet, NAILS him with a forearm against the ropes....sends him off the ropes, CLOTHESLINE, MORTON DUCKS! Morton back off the ropes, THEZ PRESS! ONE, TWO, BULLET BREAKS IT UP! RM: That's it! All four men are gonna be in the ring now! BB: You're right! Chad Gibson into the ring and he HAMMERS Bullet with a right hand! Bullet stumbles over the top rope, and down to the floor! Scope charges Gibson from behind, but he's forgetting about Steve Morton! Morton with a knee to the back, spins him around, and CONNECTS WITH AN IMPLANT DDT! RM: But, LOOK OUT! Bullet's getting back into the ring! BB: Bullet thinks he's sneaking up on the CS Express...BUT MORTON AND GIBSON TURN AROUND AND CONNECT WITH A DOUBLE DROPKICK! Bullet again out to the floor! Gibson SLAMS Scope down to the canvas, and Morton's going up top.....HERE COMES THE ROCKET LAUNCHER....YES! THIS ONE'S OVER! ONE, TWO, THREE!!! THE CS EXPRESS gets the VICTORY! RM: Yeah, but my midget friends could have done a better job than those two losers! (Burps) Geez...I don't feel that good again.... BB: Hopefully, this will get Morton and Gibson back on track as they hope to get back in the ring with Tully Planchard and Ern Enderson, the <> Cutters...who now, are legally known as the Horsemen? The name game's in full effect here in the CSWA, that's for sure..... RM: Well, we're gonna see two of the FORMER Horsemen face off against each other for the PRESIDENTIAL Championship in just a little bit.... BB: That's right, as "Marvelous" MIKE CHAIN defends the title against his FORMER PARTNER, JACK "Summer" SAMSON! That's gonna be one that you don't want to miss! Also, the IC Championship will be on the line as the ELIMINATOR defends against ATTAXX in a BASEBRAWL MATCH! That should be interesting! RM: And, you're all gonna get to see my good friend, the DISCO MIDGET in action, as the DISCO EXPRESS defends the UNIFIED World Tag Team Championship against the <> Cutters, or the Horsemen, or whatever they're going as these days! BB: There's ALSO an added stipulation in this one....since BOTH Chad Merritt, and Maxwell Diamond got involved in the last encounter between these two teams....they will be locked in SEPARATE CAGES and hoisted 35 FEET above the ring! That should keep this one fair....and honestly, I think Enderson and Planchard are going to pull it out this time! RM: You can think whatever you want....but the power of midgets will prevail once again! (Totters over and falls on the ground...) BB: Oh my. I think the Red Midget is finally paralyzed drunk! Fans, we've got to take a break...while we figure out what to do with him....we'll be back with RAZORBACK vs. ANARKY in a CAGE DEATH MATCH....ANYTHING GOES....but first, let's head to the darkness....and JIM WILLIAMS....who, I thought for sure we had seen the end of at Winter's Warriors VII! We'll be right back! (Fade into a dark room...where Jim Williams, in burn bandages...sits in a wooden chair...the room is lit only by candles...and although Williams' face is blacked out.... insane cackling can be heard in the background....) ============================================================ JIM WILLIAMS: Did you really think....this was the end? Did you really think....25,000 volts....was enough to stop the ANTI-CHRIST? (Laughs) Nothing has ended....in fact, my friends, this is just the beginning. Hornet...the nightmares ...the horrors you lived through...were nothing in comparison to what is in store for you this time...you might have survived the first time...but survival, for you, was nothing but a mere stroke of luck. I had you destroyed....I had you revealed for the sinner....for the liar....for the cheat you were....but a stroke of fate saved you. Still, Hornet....you proved your true colors. You....are no better than me....and we will meet....we will meet once again in the ring....and we will meet in the afterlife....because, Hornet....when it comes time for judgement....your fate has been sealed....you can delay your fate....you can fight it until it drains every ounce of energy out of your own very soul....but it is your fate....it will happen....and when time comes, Hornet....when time comes for you and I to face again....you will burn in the fires of your own creation. The pain....the suffering....the agony....that I've been through....will be nothing....a mere trifle matter....when compared to what is in store for you....you see....Hornet... ..it strikes....when you least expect it....(Laughs insanely as the camera fades to black....) ============================================================ BB: Wow. To say there's something wrong with that man would be a severe understatement. I don't have any idea what he's talking about, but if I was Hornet, I'd be careful, because it seems that Jim Williams still has some unfinished business with him after what transpired at WW VII! Now, it seems the Red Midget was so intoxicated that he had to have his stomach pumped....so, replacing him for the rest of the night....here is Mad Mike! MM: The pleasure is all yours, Buckley! You know, I haven't been up here in awhile...I kinda like it! Maybe I'll stick around for a bit! BB: Here's hoping you don't.... MM: What'd you say, toupee-boy? Do you think anyone out there actually thinks that's real? Damn, I mean, you'd stand a better chance convincing someone you weren't bald if you stuck a dead raccoon on your head! BB: That's quite enough....fans, before Mad Mike earns himself a lawsuit, let's take it down to ringside for a CAGE DEATH MATCH! ============================================================ STEEL CAGE DEATH MATCH ANARKY vs. RAZORBACK ============================================================ BB: The rules are simple in this one....there ARE NO RULES! There's the bell, and Anarky charges into Razorback and sends him back into the cage! Anarky grabs Razorback by the hair, and RUNS HIM INTO THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE CAGE! MM: Who in the WORLD booked this? I hope those people are going to get popcorn...and not leaving! BB: Poison Ivy at ringside for Anarky, and she's cheering on her man! Anarky picks up Razorback, and SLAMS him down to the canvas! Anarky off the ropes, DROPS A BIG ELBOW! A cover, ONE, TWO, kickout by Razorback! Anarky with Razorback, and now he's choking him out on the bottom rope! Worthington just there to count the pinfall, there isn't a whole lot he can do! Fans, we'll be right back! BB: Anarky still choking Razorback out on the ropes, and finally, he brings the big man to his feet! Anarky pointing to the other side of the cage, I guess he's gonna slam Razorback into it! MM: Geez, this match must be getting to your head....oh, wait a second....I forgot....you're ALWAYS this boring. BB: Anarky charging Razorback into the cage, NO! Razorback blocks and SLAMS Anarky into it! Anarky staggered, and Razorback strikes with a BIG RIGHT HAND, followed by a left! Razorback with a LARIET, and Anarky crashes down to the canvas! Razorback with a cover, ONE, TWO, Anarky easily out of this one! MM: I think I've seen enough....I'm gonna have to stop this one! BB: No, you won't. You'll be sitting down, Mad Mike. Razorback with control, he sends Anarky off the ropes, CONNECTS WITH A BIG POWERSLAM! Razorback going to his boots, and what's he pulling out? It looks like a spur! MM: Well...maybe if he slices his wrists...this might get a little interesting. BB: You're terrible. Razorback has the spur, and he's rubbing it against the head of Anarky! Blood spurting everywhere, but there isn't a whole lot that Ben Worthington can do about it, afterall, this one is EVERYTHING GOES! Razorback finally throws down the spur, and picks up Anarky, KNEEBREAKER! Poison Ivy screaming at Anarky, hoping to get him back into this match! MM: That wasn't what she was screaming....I think she wants to go with Worthington! BB: (Sighs) I'd take out your mic cord...but, well, I'm not your employer. Anarky down on the canvas, and holding his knee....Razorback pulling him into the center of the ring, what are we gonna see here? A FIGURE-FOUR? NO! Anarky with a BOOT TO THE BACK OF RAZORBACK AND HE GOES CARRYING INTO THE CAGE! Razorback staggers back, and Anarky NAILS him with a CLOTHESLINE TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD! MM: Well, at least it's picking up a little. BB: Razorback down on the canvas, and he's in a whole lot of trouble! Anarky sends him into the corner, and CHARGES IN WITH A CLOTHESLINE! And now, Anarky, he's taking off his boot! Razorback staggers out of the corner, and Anarky just LEVELED him with the boot! Mad Mike, he might be out! MM: You know, I was just contemplating something....I think I know why they call this a DEATH MATCH! BB: I'm really afraid to ask....Anarky with the cover, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Razorback somehow managed to get his foot on the ropes...how, I have no idea! MM: It's called a death match....because if I have to watch anymore of this....I'm afraid I might kill myself! BB: I didn't ask you for that witty retort. Razorback close to being finished off by Anarky, and now, Anarky's going up top! This might be a mistake, because he's taking quite a bit of time to get up there! MM: Why don't they just roll Space God in here? I mean, once truthfully isn't enough! BB: Razorback getting back to his feet.....OH NO! BB: RAZORBACK SLAMS ANARKY OFF THE TOP! Razorback not going for a cover, instead he pulls Anarky to his feet, and he's locking in an ABDOMINAL STRETCH! MM: And you wonder why all of your color men are drunks? Geez....if I had to put up with *this* day and night... BB: Anarky trying to fight it, and he flips Razorback down to the canvas! Anarky with a FLYING CLOTHESLINE, IT CONNECTS! Anarky coming back here, as he ROCKS Razorback with right and left hand shots! Anarky sneaks in behind Razorback, and takes him down to the canvas, WAISTLOCK SUPLEX! ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Razorback just kicks out! MM: Can't Worthington call this one a draw on the basis that both wrestlers are mentally incompatant? BB: I'm afraid not. Anarky resting Razorback against the cage, and we might be seeing the beginning of the end right here! MM: Oh, trust me...the beginning of the end was a LONG time ago! BB: Anarky charges into the cage....FLYING BODYPRESS, AND RAZORBACK DUCKS! Anarky slammed into the cage hard! Razorback grabs him from behind and rolls him up, ONE, TWO, THREE!!! I DON'T BELIEVE IT! This one's over, and Razorback pulls out the upset victory tonight on Anniversary Day II! MM: I don't care who won that one....at least it's over! BB: Before we head back down to ringside....let's just get ANOTHER look at why the CSWA is where the MIDGETS PLAY! MM: Is that necessarily a good thing? BB: Who asked you? ============================================================ (Cut to: Footage of Chad Merritt knocking out Submarine with a phone and Tully Planchard covering him for a three count....) ============================================================ BB: Those are the UNIVERSAL TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONS? (Laughs) Well, up next, we've got our first title match of the night, and it's going to be an interesting one....as two men face off in a RE-MATCH! Now, we all remember that ATTAXX seemed to have pulled out the victory awhile back over the ELIMINATOR for the Intracontinental Championship....but, the decision was OVERTURNED! Now, the two same men will face off in a BASEBRAWL MATCH! MM: Attaxx took it to Eli last time....and now, if he could ever reach up the pole and get his hands on that baseball bat....well, Eli's long reign as IC Champion will be OVER! Mark my word..... BB: This one should be interesting, to say the least...let's take it on down to ringside! ============================================================ INTRACONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH *BASEBRAWL MATCH* THE ELIMINATOR vs. ATTAXX ============================================================ BB: We're ready to go, and remember, whoever climbs up the pole in that corner and brings down the baseball bat....GETS TO USE IT! Eli and ATTAXX lock up, and neither man is moving! Finally, ATTAXX with a rake to the eyes, and now he HAMMERS Eli with a big right hand! ATTAXX sends Eli in for the ride, and LEVELS HIM WITH A BIG BOOT TO THE FACE! MM: Well, this certainly isn't going to be a match of skill! BB: ATTAXX backs Eli into the corner, and now he's hammering him with a series of shoulderblocks! ATTAXX grabs Eli by the hair, WHIPS him into the opposite corner, charges....AND ELI PUTS UP THE BOOT! Eli with a HUGE CLOTHESLINE, and ATTAXX goes down like a ton of bricks! MM: Haven't we seen ENOUGH of Poison Ivy for one night? I hope Rosenthal gives her what she deserves.... BB: It's safe to say that Rosenthal will be staying away from Poison Ivy! Eli keeps control of the match, hammering ATTAXX against the ropes, sends him off the ropes, POWERSLAM....YES, HE CONNECTS! Eli not going for a cover, instead he's climbing up the pole....I don't know, it might be a little early into this one to be going for that! ATTAXX to his feet, and he's pulling Eli down! ATTAXX with a series of right hands, and the Eliminator is down on the canvas! MM: You know, it's about time that the Eliminator thinks about running...there's no shame in it! BB: ATTAXX picks up the Eliminator and HITS A BACKBREAKER! ATTAXX off the ropes, and he DROPS A LEG! ATTAXX with a cover, ONE, TWO, Eli with the powerful kickout! Remember, you can win this match WITHOUT the bat...but, I would think both competitors would love to use it to their advantage! Eli staggering back to his feet, and ATTAXX CLOTHESLINES HIM OVER THE TOP AND DOWN TO THE FLOOR! MM: Why is the idiot going outside? He could just get the bat and win the match! BB: That's a good question, but ATTAXX is going to the outside anyways....ATTAXX grabs Eli, and SLAMS him into the ring apron! ATTAXX whips Eli....INTO THE STAIRS! Those ringside stairs went flying, and I'll tell you, the Eliminator is hurt....he's in danger of losing the IC Championship! MM: Especially since ATTAXX is going into the ring! BB: That's right! Eli is down on the outside of the ring, and ATTAXX is climbing the pole....there's no way that anyone's gonna be able to stop him this time....HE'S GOT THE BAT! Eli just getting to his feet on the outside, and ATTAXX is sneaking up on him! MM: I love it! ATTAXX is gonna knock the sap into next week! BB: ATTAXX NAILS ELI WITH THE BASEBALL BAT FROM BEHIND! ATTAXX rolls Eli into the ring, and we're gonna see a new champion crowned here tonight for sure! ATTAXX with a cover, ONE, TWO, THREE....NO! Eli just got the shoulder up! How in the WORLD did he manage to do that? The crowd here to it's feet, hoping to cheer on the Eliminator! MM: Which just proves that they're a bunch of morons themselves! BB: ATTAXX pulls Eli to his feet, and he's jamming the bat into his ribcage! ATTAXX sends Eli off the ropes, and he's got the bat....HE'S GONNA BAT CLOTHESLINE ELI.....NO! ELI DUCKS UNDER! ELI back off the ropes, and ATTAXX SWINGS THE BAT....HE MISSES! ELI SPINS ATTAXX AROUND, AND LEVELS HIM WITH A CLOTHESLINE! MM: I don't believe what I'm seeing! This just ain't fair! BB: ELI picks up ATTAXX....BIG CHOKESLAM! Rosenthal into the ring, and ELI CRACKS HIM OVER THE HEAD WITH THE BAT! ELI rests the bat down in the center of the ring.....OH NO! BB: ELI...WITH A POWERBOMB DOWN ON THE BAT! ATTAXX is OUT COLD! Eli with the cover, ONE, TWO, THREE!!! THIS ONE'S OVER, and ELI retains yet again! Wait a second...Eli's asking for the house mic....what could he possibly have to say! MM: Hell, I didn't even know the guy could talk! BB: That's enough.... ============================================================ ELIMINATOR: You know something? Defending this title.... (Flashes the IC Championship to the camera) it just isn't a challenge anymore. I want to prove that I'm the BEST in the CSWA....and I want something better than this....and I'm gonna get it! (Throws down the IC Championship....) ============================================================ BB: I don't believe it! The Eliminator has just vacated the Intracontinental Championship, a title he's held for almost EIGHT MONTHS! We're gonna have to get a talk with someone upstairs to see what the status of that title is! But, now, it's time for more action! ============================================================ (Note: The next two matches are written in SHORT FORM. I'm not feeling well at all right now, and if I tried to write them out, I have no idea when I'd be done....sorry for any inconvience....) ============================================================ PRESIDENTIAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH MIKE CHAIN vs. JACK SAMSON ============================================================ These two FORMER TAG-TEAM PARTNERS went at it in a WAR! Chain took the advantage early after hitting a CHOKESLAM and following it up with a DDT, but Samson mustered a kickout! When the Champion, Mike Chain, missed a corner charge, Samson took full advantage, unloading on Chain with a whole series of power manuevers! Chain was staggered, and Samson went up top, connecting with a FLYING CLOTHESLINE, and it looked like a new champion would be crowned! When Samson went for the cover, though.....Jimmy Ray Vaughn interfered, and pulled Samson off! Samson went to confront Vaughn, when Chain got back to his feet and kneed Samson in the back! As Samson reeled, Vaughn nailed him with a big right hand, and Chain began to turn things around! After a series of SUPLEXES, and a BOSTON CRAB, Jack Samson seemed ripe for the picking. Chain sent Samson off the ropes and went for the LETHAL INJECTION....BUT SAMSON DUCKED OUT OF IT, HIT A FLYING CROSSBODY, and GOT THE THREE COUNT! Jack Samson won the match and became the NEW PRESIDENTIAL CHAMPION, but paid for it after the match as Chain and Vaughn laid him out in the center of the ring! ============================================================ UNIFIED WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH DISCO EXPRESS vs The <> CUTTERS ============================================================ With BOTH Chad Merritt and Maxwell Diamond suspended high above the ring, it seemed certain that we would see a fair match! Early on, the Disco Inferno used his speed to an advantage over Tully Planchard....hitting a SHOOTING STAR PRESS and a FRANK-N-PARSONS! Still, he couldn't get the pin and eventually tagged in the Boogie Man! Boogie tried to overpower Planchard, but made a mistake, and Planchard hit a quick DDT out of nowhere! Planchard then tagged in Enderson, who in the <> Cutter tradition, took Boogie Man's right arm and worked it over! Finally, Enderson hit the SPINEBUSTER SLAM, but when he went for the cover, Disco Inferno charged into the ring and saved the day! Both Enderson and Planchard tried to double-team Inferno as Worthington lost control of the match.....the <> Cutters went for a DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE, but Inferno ducked under and shocked both men with a DOUBLE DROPKICK OF HIS OWN! The Disco Express seemed to be in control as they dumped Enderson out of the ring, going for the DISCO BOMB! (Disco/<> Cutter cont.) At the same time, Maxwell Diamond dropped brass knuckles from out of his cage, and Tully Planchard went for them...but the OTHER CO-COMMISSIONER, Stephen Thomas, came down to ringside and got them before Planchard did, running back to the lockers! During all of this chaos, everyone stopped, but the Disco Inferno had the good sense to tag himself in and ROLL UP THE UNEXPECTING ERN ENDERSON FROM BEHIND TO GET THE THREE COUNT AND A VICTORY FOR THE DISCO EXPRESS! ============================================================ BB: How about that! Maxwell Diamond sure isn't gonna be a happy camper backstage! Fans, we've got to take a break, but we'll be right back with our MAIN EVENT TONIGHT...... "The Greatest American Hero" HORNET....vs. "DEVASTATING" MIKE RANDALLS! MM: I can't wait for that one! BB: You won't have to....we'll have after this break from our sponsors! ============================================================ ============================================================ BILL BUCKLEY: It's been a long night RED(or a long week :)) but finally we've arrived to our MAIN EVENT! RED MIDGET: It's about time....my butt has fallen asleep! BILL BUCKLEY: Was that really necessary?! RED MIDGET: Sorry..I felt like sharing! BILL BUCKLEY: It's time for HORNET/Randalls! RED, these two men have had one of the most colored histories in the CSWA! HORNET has held the UNIFIED World on more occassions than any other wrestler..Randalls on the other hand has also held the UNIFIED World Title, and has been a 3-time ENTERPRISE World Heavyweight Champion, both of these men, excluding Tom Adler have been the best in the business over the past two years! RED MIDGET: No doubt about it, but their time is up. Randalls is now the USN Champion, and HORNET well his back is over, Bill. His turn on GUNS was the last restort..he's finished! BILL BUCKLEY: I'd have to disagree..it's only a matter of time before we see these two men with World Title gold around their waist once again! RED MIDGET: We shall see big man! BILL BUCKLEY: RED, last year's WINTER'S WARRIORS match between HORNET and Randalls has to be considered one of the top 5 matches in CSWA history! RED MIDGET: That match we thought ended their fued, but over the past few months, Bill, Randalls drugged HORNET! BILL BUCKLEY: Drugs that caused the former UNIFIED champ to dream and believe that he killed Alicia! RED MIDGET: Blah..Blah..Blah...here we are! BILL BUCKLEY: Well put! Rhubarb let's get it on! ============================================================ HORNET vs 'Devasting' Mike Randalls BILL BUCKLEY: This match is non-title, so if HORNET wins..he will not be the NEW USN Champion! RED MIDGET: That's generally the way non-title matches work. BILL BUCKLEY: Pipe down! Randalls is in the ring..he takes off the USN belt...and gives HORNET a look, with those cold dead eyes! RED MIDGET: He means business HORNET, run while you still can! (Randalls/HORNET cont.....) BILL BUCKLEY: There's the bell...both men however don't move! HORNET and Randalls are just looking at one another! Oh, the hatred runs deep between these two men! RED MIDGET: No kidding! BILL BUCKLEY: HORNET, makes his way over to Randalls and he slaps his face!! Since WW7 we've seen a different side of HORNET! RED MIDGET: Maybe so, but you don't go around slapping Mike Randalls! BILL BUCKLEY: Randalls, proves your point as he decks HORNET! Mike on top of HORNET, he's hammering away!! HORNET, rolls Randalls over, now he's the one driving his fists through Mike's head! RED MIDGET: Get the women and children out of the room, this one is going to get crazy! BILL BUCKLEY: HORNET tosses Mike through the ropes! HORNET bounces off the ropes..gets a running start and nails Mike with a Shooting Star Press!! Listen to the Merritt Auditorium explode after that one! This is HORNET's backyard! RED MIDGET: It's also an unfair advantage! HORNET should not be allowed to wrestle here! BILL BUCKLEY: Whatever, Tatoo. HORNET tries to ram Randalls into the iron post, but Mike fires the former Champ there first! That's going to take the wind out of his sails! RED MIDGET: Randalls has a chair, OHMY! This is his game! Nobody does Hardcore better than Mike Randalls...Wild Asian comes close, but Randalls is Randalls! Mike goes for a piledriver on the concrete floor!! Not quite, HORNET back body drops Randalls! He was that close to being dropped on that back!! RED MIDGET: He's just half a man, Bill, how can he expect to win matches like this! BILL BUCKLEY: HORNET rolls Randalls back in the ring.. HORNET shoots himself over the ropes, but Randalls rolls him over, ONE....TWO....NO! That was a nice move! RED MIDGET: Randalls can do more than just brawl, as he's showing here tonight! BILL BUCKLEY: Randalls kicks HORNET in the groin...Randalls with a short arm clothesline! He hits you with two or three offensive moves, seemingly out of nowhere! RED MIDGET: That's why he's one of the best, Bill! You don't become UNIFIED Champion by slacking off! BILL BUCKLEY: Mike picks up HORNET's legs...and drops the leg between them! RED MIDGET: Oh doctor! BILL BUCKLEY: Randalls sends HORNET into the ropes, flying burritto!! That's a move you don't see that often anymore! Randalls climbs to the top rope! RED MIDGET: He's showing us a litle of everything tonight! BILL BUCKLEY: Randalls to the top, but HORNET is there! HORNET yanks at Mike's right leg, and Randalls drops on the top turnbuckle!! RED MIDGET: Sing like a girl, Mikey! BILL BUCKLEY: HORNET hooks the tights, Superplex!! This one has gone back and forth, back and forth!! HORNET, for some reason...backs into the corner! He's just standing there! Randalls to his feet....and HORNET's laughing at him! RED MIDGET: What in the small, small world? BILL BUCKLEY: Randalls stands there..he's puzzled...HORNET is backed into the corner laughing his head off!! (crowd roars)...What!! MARK WINDHAM is in the ring! He's behind Randalls, Mark clips the knee!!! I don't believe this! RED MIDGET: What's going on with HORNET these days?!! BILL BUCKLEY: That's what I want to know!! Windham is pounding away at Randalls...HORNET looks to the entrance way and motions for someone!! WHAT'S THIS!!! "Golden Boy" PAUL PIERCE IS RUNNING DOWN TO AISLE!! Pierce in the ring, he shoves Windham aside, and now it's Pierce taking Randalls to town!! RED MIDGET: Pierce is with HORNET and Windham? Oh boy BILL BUCKLEY: All three men stomping away at Randalls! Look at Windham, RED, I don't think he's too happy with Pierce! RED MIDGET: You saw what happened at the Workout earlier tonight! BILL BUCKLEY: Politics make for strange bed fellows I guess...HORNET with the Scorpion Deathlock!! They're trying to end Mike's career!! RED MIDGET: At this rate, they'll succeed! BILL BUCKLEY: Pierce again jumps on Randall, as HORNET releases the Scorpion!! Windham goes over and yanks Paul off of Randalls...those two guys...this is weird! RED MIDGET: Hey, you don't have to get along to work together! BILL BUCKLEY: Both HORNET and Windham are trying to force Pierce out of the ring, so they can high tail it out of here! Pierce breaks free of their control, he's got a coal miner's glove on, he clocks Randalls with the glove!! And spits on him for good measure!! Goodness!!! Windham picks up Pierce and nearly tosses him over the top rope! BILL BUCKLEY: I don't know about those two guys!! All three men make their way back to the locker rooms! Pierce is getting a tounge lashing for that extra attack on Randalls! RED MIDGET: America's Team adds the Golden Boy! Man oh Man alive! BILL BUCKLEY: Fans, we're flush out of time...we'll see you later!! For Rudy Seizter, and the RED Midget, this is Bill Buckley!! Seeya